Gabe's Mom

The End

2010-01-19T11:56:00.001-06:00

This is the end of this blog, but a new one is coming! I'm rolling Gabe's Mom, Greg's Wife, and Wish I Might into one! For those of you who follow along, when the new blog is up and running, I'll make one final post with the new address. And, for all my facebook friends, I'll send you a link! It's just too hard to manage 2 blogs and a website... I am still in the planning stages, but when I'm done, I think my life will be much more simple!!

Wanted to get this down...

2009-11-20T08:46:00.003-06:00

I'm working on Disney pictures for a blog update, but over half of the pictures were taken in RAW by mistake! (Greg: Honey, what's all this crap on the screen on your camera? -while pushing buttons- Me: It's a HISTOGRAM! Don't touch it!)hehehehe... So, I need to figure out how to process RAW in Photoshop 7. I think I need to use a plug in, but I just haven't had the time to mess with it yet.

I did want to get this down though... This morning Gabe and I were sitting on the couch watching some TV (or as Gabe calls it, 'TD') and he looked up at me and said, "Mommy, I'm so glad you're here". Oh my goodness. That was the most wonderful thing I've ever heard.

He has no idea how much that little statement made me feel so happy. Of course, he probably meant, I'm glad you're here and I'm not at daycare today. On Thursdays and Fridays he'll say, "No Monica's, right Mom?" It's not that he doesn't enjoy daycare, but I think it's that he enjoys our days at home together. So do I, buddy, so do I. And, I'm so glad YOU're here too.

It's been nearly 3 years since this awesome boy became a part of our family. I can't imagine one second of my life without him here. I can't imagine a day in my life where I didn't hear his adorable toddler voice.

I'm so glad I'm here too, buddy. So glad.

Gaber Update

2009-11-05T10:41:00.003-06:00

Just a few fun facts about the Gabers right now...

•He's doing a great job going potty on the potty chair. We're still working on #2, but, he'll get it!
•Gabe starts preschool in 2010! I can hardly believe that's coming up in January. AND, he gets to have Mrs. Hoobler!
•Gabe's vocabulary has sky-rocketed. He talks in complete sentences, but still has problems with l's, r's, and y's - totally normal for his age.
•Gabe is still a pretty picky eater. He's expanded his horizons a little bit, but not much!
•Rewards and punishments have been working out pretty well - when Gabe misbehaves we do one of three things... Option #1 is timeout. Option #2 is putting a toy in time out. And, Option #3 is taking a sticker off of his chore chart.

We've started a "chore chart" for Gabe with the following "chores":

Check to make sure Jinxi has food & water (we just have him go look and then we fill it up if she's out)
Go to the bathroom to get his brush in the mornings
Take his dirty clothes to the hamper
Pick up toys before bedtime
Listening (this is one that's had a few stars taken away!:)
Being good in the store
Pooping on the potty

Once he fills up his chore chart, he gets a special prize - like a movie or a new M.A.S.K. guy.

Saturday, we leave for Disney!! Gabe is super excited about it. (so are Mommy & Daddy!) I can't wait to see my little guy's face when he sees Disney. Greg's parents and my mom are going as well. My dad's had a late harvest this year, so he has to miss it. We are all getting really excited. There will be a TON of pictures when we get back!

Biggest reason for my absence...

2009-11-02T17:50:00.005-06:00

Wish I Might has had quite a busy Summer/Fall. I am extremely blessed that people have been wanting to book me for photography and I'm already taking Christmas card orders. I am loving every minute. I have taken senior sessions, engagement sessions, family sessions, and a couple of weddings. I am feeling really proud of starting something myself and having a business that I created.

Along with all those good feelings, come a lot of other feelings... Like guilt - spending too much time at the computer, stress - wondering how in the heck I'm going to get it all done, and worry - about my skills... I mean, I feel that I have an eye for it, but I've not been in the business long. I still have a LOT to learn. I feel like I learn more with each session I take. And, each session has its humbling moments. Like, "DOH! I should've focused better there... I knew better than that!" or, "You dork! Didn't you notice the telephone pole behind her that's now sticking out of her head?!" It's kind of a tough business too. There are a lot of "snobby" photographers out there... But, to be fair, there are a lot of really nice ones out there too who understand that you're still a newbie and you're learning. I feel like telling the snobby ones, "hey, you started SOMEWHERE!" And then, there are photographers out there that think they can charge UNBELIEVABLE prices and you just wonder how they ever got to that point. I keep my prices pretty low, for the simple fact that there really are a lot of photographers out there. People can go to any town and find a photographer... heck, they can come to my town and find a few! :) But, I feel like, especially early on, I need to keep my prices pretty low. Next year, however, they're going up a bit! This is a lot of work!

I've been throwing the idea around about saving up for a studio... I really feel like that's something I want to do. Greg and I had a talk about our goals for Wish I Might and I told him that's something I saw long term. The next week, I got a call from one of my friend's moms. She is a church secretary and they're remodelling their vestibule. When they cleaned out the closets, guess what they found? A Lowel studio lighting kit. Guess who she called? And guess who has it now? And, guess what that's perfect for? Maybe starting up a studio in the future? Crazy, huh?

So, now, over the winter, in all my free time, I hope to find out how to use this stuff!

My life's been pretty busy lately. I am loving it and I'm anxious to see where this journey will take me. I hope it leads to a studio someday... we shall see.

Happy Halloween!

2009-11-01T00:06:00.002-05:00

Wasn't he the cutest Toodah ever? I wanted to make sure I got this down... This is how Gabe sang trick or treat:

"Twicked or Tweet, smell my feet, give me somefing good to eat. If you not, I don't care, I'll pull my underwear down!"

He learned this from his buddy Will last year, and this year he started singing it again. It was so funny! We had a great Halloween. Gabe and his friend, McCarthy (my BFF's grandson), went trick or treating together. We drove them around in the suburban, or as I like to call the "super ban". We had a really great time. It was another one of those moments where I just stopped for a minute and remembered a time when I wondered if I'd ever be doing this. If I'd ever hear a child say, "C'mon, Mom! Let's go to diss house!" My heart was warmed so much by this excited little guy tonight.

After trick or treating, we headed over to Poke's house for the 6th Annual Hurloween. Gabe and I stayed for supper and visited for a bit, and Daddy stayed to hang out with the guys. Gabe had a busy day today, so he pretty much crashed as soon as his head hit the pillow. Hurloween was fun... I had a really nice compliment from Poke about my photography. We love Poke and Cari. They are great friends and it's nice to know we've got an ongoing get together each year with such great people.

Well, I have to say, shocked... two posts in two days?! Wowza!

Oh, and.......... we're leaving for Disney in 7 days!!!!!!!!

Yes, We're Still Here!

2009-10-30T20:53:00.002-05:00

Ok, so I've been like the worst blogger ever. I haven't updated in so long. Life has been so busy for us lately. Fall has been CRAZY busy. My photography business has really been picking up - I already have 2 weddings for the beginning of next year. And, when I say next year, I mean I have one on January 1st and the other on January 2nd! One of them is rather small, so it shouldn't be too much work, but the other one will be a full day. Am I nuts? Yes, I think so. The good news is, I'm learning more and more with each session that I take and I'm liking each session better than the one before.

Ok, now onto the Gabers! He's really growing and changing so much. He's saying things like "I have an idea!" or "I pet Jinxi so she more comfortable!". He is doing great potty training. We still put a diaper on him at night, but daytime, he never has accidents. Right now, he's REALLY into his M.A.S.K. guys. M.A.S.K. is a cartoon Greg used to watch when he was little. Honestly, the animation is pretty crappy, but Gabe (and Greg!) love it. I love watching Gabe play with Greg's old toys. Greg's mom had saved some of them and gave them to Gabe. He just loves them.

This year for Halloween, Gabe is going to be Woody from Toy Story. He looks SO adorable in his costume! We took him out to my mom and dad's tonight since my mom has to work tomorrow. He even sang, "Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat... if you don't, I don't care, I'll pull down your underwear!" But Gabe says, "if you not, I don't care, I'll pull my underwear down!" Too funny.

Well, I did just want to get an update out there because it's been almost 2 months exactly since I've posted. I'll try harder. I'll make it a priority, I promise!! :)

Gabe Singing...

2009-08-31T22:44:00.003-05:00

Life is good.

2009-08-23T19:55:00.002-05:00

He says he wants to be a "copper". (aka cop) and he won't give Mommy and Daddy any tickets! It's so cute, he'll say "When Gabe grows up, Gabe be a copper and no tickets Mommy and Daddy."

Recently, things have been getting busier for Gabe's Mom. I had 2 sessions this week, then I've got 2 senior sessions next week and already 2 lined up for the beginning of September. I know it doesn't seem like much, but to me, it's a lot! AND, senior sessions are my FAVORITE. Seniors are so much fun to work with. They'll do anything for you. You don't have to constantly fight to get their attention, bribe them with candy, threaten bedtime, etc... (gee, guess who was a difficult photo subject today!?)

Life is good right now. Busy, but good. I'm enjoying my new business a lot, my Gabers has been having many less tantrums, and Greg's been home quite a bit lately. Life is good.

Learning

2009-08-13T20:40:00.002-05:00

I've written a lot of posts about watching Gabe learn a lot of new things. But, I don't know if I've really written much about the things I've learned since becoming a parent. So, I thought I'd share some of those things. I wanted to get them down for Gabe since (hopefully!!!) someday, he'll want to have children too.

I've learned that I am capable of loving someone more than I ever thought I would. I had no idea that a smile on your child's face, can make your day 100% better. I had no idea the amount of joy your child could bring just by talking to you on the phone, or giving you a hug, or just saying "Thank you, Mommy" (Gabespeak: "Tank you, Mommy")
I knew I would love watching our parents with Gabe. But I've learned that just seeing Gabe can make their day better. If my mom's had a bad week at work, seeing "her Gabers" she says is just what she needs. Or, when PawPaw H was in the hospital, his face lit up when he saw Gabe. Grandparents love their grandkids so very much!
I've also learned that Grandparents give your child WAY too much sugar. They love seeing Gabe enjoying candy. Gabe knows Abba Piff (now Abba Piff instead of Abba Piss) will give him "tweets" and he knows where PawPaw H's treat drawer is. It's too cute.
I've learned that God has really blessed us with sleep and renewal time. Meaning, you could've had a really rough day with your kiddo, but then when you wake up the next morning, the first person you want to see is him! When Gabe was a baby, I used to miss him when he slept. I still do now, but now, he and I sleep the same hours. And, I have to admit, naptime for him is downtime for me!
I've also learned that each age comes with it's own challenges AND blessings. (Another God thing). When Gabe was a baby, the fussiness was hard, but the cuddling was my favorite. I loved giving him baths, I loved watching all of his firsts, and I loved feeding him. As a toddler, the tantrums have been tough, the "sassy talking" has been tough to control, and the timeouts haven't been fun. But, the hugs, the conversations, the "La U Mom"'s, and the joy of seeing him try new things have been so wonderful.
I've also learned that you need to make time with your spouse. It's so important not to focus your entire world only on your child... I've learned you need to remember your relationship as a couple as well.

I could write and write about the different things I've learned. I am learning everyday. How to be patient, how to put my own stuff aside and read a book to my boy, how to play on a playground again, how to enjoy swimming again, etc...

No matter the challenges, no matter the hard lessons, I am loving this life - being Gabe's Mom. I was meant to be his mommy and he was meant to be my boy. That's not something I've learned, that's just something I know.

Love him.

2009-08-05T22:51:00.002-05:00

Just love this kid. That's all I gotta say.

Smith-Nandez Weekend!

2009-07-30T21:05:00.003-05:00

So, it's a big weekend! My little sister, Jenny and her fiance, Rene are getting married! I am so looking forward to seeing my little sister marry the man of her dreams. Rene has been a real joy to get to know and I'm very happy to have him as a brother in law. When we ask Gabe who's getting married, he says, "Jenny and Uncle Ney". It's pretty cute.

I'm a little worried about a few things... Um, I have a solo, Gabe's a ringbearer.... and I have no idea how he'll behave, and I don't know what to do about my camera! I certainly want to take it with me to take some pictures, but I don't like a couple of things about that - It's not a camera you can just throw in your purse. I'll need to take my flash. I don't want to be one of those people that's in the photographer's way. Although I love my "big camera" (as most people call it!) It's not always convenient when going on vacation with a kiddo, or going to a wedding. I'm still going to take it, and just deal. :o)

So, it should be a pretty fun weekend. Congratulations, Jenny & Rene! I hope this day is full of wonderful memories!

my reasons for lack of blogging.....

2009-07-28T22:08:00.002-05:00

Life as we know it:

Gabe's Dad gone on 2 week long business trips
a bachelorette party
1 or 2 photography sessions each week
a toddler full of energy
processing pictures until I go to bed
IM's
Tiredness
Nonstop at work
No smoking (never promise something on your kid... especially when life gets stressful!)
Nearly late to work every morning (I swear Gabe knows when I'm running late)
2 weddings down, 2 to go
Did I mention tiredness?
Dental appointments

Ok, now there have been some really great things happening too:

Gabe and I have really been bonding more - cooking together, laughing a lot, reading books (Love You Forever is our favorite right now)
I'm totally engrossed in the Twilight series and I can't stop reading at night
Gabe and I have the following conversation:

Me: I'll love you .....

Gabe: Foreber.

Me: I'll like you....

Gabe: for alldays

Me: and as long as I'm living, my....

Gabe: baby we'll be!

Reading this book to my boy nearly makes me cry every time. I always sway him towards that one when he nods his head and says, "Mom, just one more book?" Well, ok.....

My little Gabey, I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, and as long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.

All my love,

Mommy.

He's a Firecracker!

2009-07-02T01:00:00.003-05:00

Ah, my little pyro. Your Daddy has sure gotten you interested in fireworks! It is really cute to see you with a sparkler, and thankfully, you're still afraid of the big stuff, although tonight, I saw you carrying a Roman candle to Daddy.

I'm in for it.

You've been a little challenging lately as far as obeying... I say one thing and it seems like you want to do the opposite. You're my firecracker! But, you have been really affectionate lately - you've let me hold you, you've given more hugs and kisses. I guess that makes up for the, "No Gabe do it!" and the "No, bad Mommy!" statements I've been hearing lately. :) I love you, boy, but yes, it's been a challenging couple of weeks.

Speaking of "No, Gabe do it!", you STILL talk about yourself in the 3rd person. I think that is so funny! "Gabe go potty!", or "Gabe wants a hotdog for wunch", or "Gabe wike AAAAApple juice". And, speaking of potty, YOU are doing GREAT!! You go into the bathroom by yourself and go as long as you can get your pants, and you ask us when we're in public. You really have been a breeze to potty train. We're still working on #2 and during the night, but daytime, you're "trained"! Way to go big boy! Once you're completely potty-trained, we're getting you a fish tank.

I love you, my little firecracker! You're the light of my life.

Discovery Museum

2009-06-18T23:37:00.012-05:00

Last Saturday, we went to the Children's Discovery Museum. That place is like seriously THE coolest place for toddlers. We took McCarthy and some of his family with us and both of the boys had the best time! Here's a picture of me & Gabers taken by our friend, Kenny.

Gabe LOVED being able to "paint the walls" without getting in trouble! He was having a blast making a mess! And, the people that set this up, totally knew kids. I was so impressed with this place.

Little McCarthy Man driving the RED tractor! (We love the red tractors!)

This was Gabe's favorite (we'll forgive him for the green... :). On the inside of this combine was a TV screen that made it look like you were actually harvesting corn. Gabe LOVED pretending he was going off the rows and driving crooked. So, I had to pretend he was driving crazy and say "Woah!". He was just laughing so hard and having the best time!

Here's Gabe and McCarthy in the tractor driving. Notice Gabe's tongue sticking out!

Gabe playing "Operation". This was so cool. They even had a real difibulator that they had made nonfunctional. How cool!?

Gabe and I were playing "store" and I was the cashier. Gradually, all these other kids came up to me and wanted me to "ring them up". It was so cute!

And here we are making a pizza!

Our friends, Whitney & Kenny. Love them guys so much.

So, overall, did we love the Discovery Museum? YES! What a cool place. They put so much thought into it and came up with so many details! I would've been able to spend hours there as a kid... Even as an adult! It was so fun. We will definitely be taking him there again. This could be a cool place to take Gabe with his grandparents to celebrate his adoption anniversary, our celebration of life day.

Had to share this picture.... We've been doing some remodeling and we put Jinxi's food in the spare bedroom. Gabe was being unusually quiet, so I knew something was up. This is what I found:

Look at his sad little face! This was before I even said anything! In fact, I think I was really trying not to laugh!

Witnessing a Big Kid

2009-05-29T12:05:00.002-05:00

Just some things I noticed today that tell me I've got a big boy on my hands:

"Mommy, Please apple juice." (apple juice given) "Tank you".
"Ah Potty. Ah Pottttttty!!!!!!" -meaning he had to go NOW. He went on the potty chair and peed like a gallon.
He sat in the stroller for at least an hour walk around town and behaved wonderfully!
Didn't freak out when he didn't get his way. I was able to calmly talk him out of a potential tantrum.
Played outside all morning and listened to Mommy when I said graham crackers - not cookies - were the snack and that he had to have his shoes on to go outside.
He ate his entire soup with a spoon! And, he's drinking out of a big boy cup at meal time.

Isn't this awesome?? Such a great thing. But, kinda sad to see my baby growing up before my eyes! I know, everyone says it will go fast. But this fast?? Geesh. I'm so proud of my little boy today.

Why I love being a parent

2009-05-28T22:29:00.004-05:00

As much as I've promised to be a better blogger, lately it just hasn't been happening! I think it's because I really do take a lot of time writing each post I create... revising, adding pictures, etc... I probably could do it faster, but I'm kind of particular. I probably need to get over that.

I've been thinking about this post for a while. What is my favorite thing about being Gabe's Mom? Well, I think after our recent trip to the Shedd Aquarium, I've discovered my answer. I'd have to say my absolute favorite thing about being Gabe's mom is watching him truly enjoying something and having the time of his life. I love seeing him happy. Seeing Gabe enjoy something, or experiencing something new is just the most wonderful thing to witness. He was so happy at the Shedd. He (and his friend, Caleb) were fixed on some of the exhibits and it was difficult to even get them to move on to the next one! I loved seeing the smile on his face and hearing the excited giggles as he saw one of the fish move towards him. Or, when he was delighted as a turtle began to follow his movements from behind the glass. Joy. Pure joy beaming from my son's face.

I am so blessed to experience that! I am so thankful that his birth mom was able to sacrifice moments like these to make the best decision for him. I always remember her when I think about things like this. Yes, she does see him every three months, but she misses out on the day to day experiences that make him smile. She misses out on him learning new things. She misses his big smile when he goes potty on the potty chair.

On the other hand, I guess she is missing out on the not so fun moments too! Tantrums, ah those tantrums, angry hitting when he doesn't get his way, and the runny noses wiped on my shirt....

Oh yes, those moments too! But, I think God gives us those wonderful moments like the new experiences, the hugs goodnight, the "love you too mom"s, and the "play little bit"s to renew us and recharge our batteries when we get weary from the not so fun moments. How amazing is that? It is mind-boggling to me that God would know how we would need those moments to forget about the temper tantrums and the hitting the day before. It just all melts away.

When Gabe wakes up in the morning (like if he wakes up on his own and he doesn't have to be woken up to go to daycare - he doesn't really like to wake up on someone else's time frame), that is my favorite time of the day. I've said that from the time he was born. This might be weird to say, but I miss him when he sleeps. I need the break by time he goes to bed, but I sure do look forward to seeing him first thing in the morning. I think that's another gift God gives parents.

So, I just wanted to get this down. My favorite thing about being a mom - a mom to Gabe, and my favorite gift - the blessings God has clearly given us in being parents. I can't get over how God had it all figured out. It's just amazing.

About Mother's Day

2009-05-16T18:59:00.011-05:00

It was a great Mother's Day this year... We went to Gabe's Dad's parents' house and spent the afternoon there. We celebrated Mother's Day with my mom a couple of days before. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful mom and mother in law. They have been so supportive of us and our family. I hope that someday Gabe will feel the same about me. I am very fortunate to have my mom, Greg's mom and my sisters in law, Missy and Jen in my life because they are wonderful examples of what Moms should be. They have all taught me so much about being a mom - loving my child, teaching my child, disciplining my child, etc... I love each of these women so much.

Here are my awesome "in laws". We had a great Mother's Day with them.

My sisters in law and my mother in law.

Laughing at PawPaw. I love this picture even though I look like a major dork.

Gabe learning how to play baseball with "Uncle Jesse" (he calls Uncle Jeffy "Uncle Jesse"!)

Picking Momma a flower.

Gabe with his cousins. I LOVE this picture because this facial expression is SO Gabe.

And, it was a Happy Mother's Day for this Momma Bird too! These baby birds hatched that morning!

I know I should be used to the fact by now, but sometimes I have to stop and and tell myself again that I'm a mom! I just still can't believe that I am so blessed. I never knew that it would be this wonderful. I am really, truly enjoying this age. Tonight, Gabe and I played "Spiderman" up in the playhouse while Daddy mowed below. I never thought that the highlight of my day would be throwing fake punches and pretending to be "got by the bad guy", but it really was. We had an absolute blast. He laughed so hard, and so did I! He kept saying, "More Mommy!" and he'd just laugh and laugh and laugh. Just sitting here now, I could cry thinking about how much I love my little boy.

I thought of all of you waiting moms out there too, like I do every Mother's Day. I know how hard it is to hold out hope for your child. That you will conceive, or that your child's birth mom will stay healthy carrying your child, or that your overseas trip will be a safe one, etc... All I can tell you is don't give up - hold out hope. God knows the desires of your heart. Pray. Wait. Hope. Endure... I promise you...

God will fulfill the desires of your heart. He knows what is best for you. I prayed that God would fulfill my heart's desire and He did. Bigger and better than I ever could have imagined. He will do that for you too. I really believe that. And, if having a child isn't a part of His plan for you, I believe He will fill that missing piece in another way. I believe He will make you complete, as long as He is the center of it all.

So, waiting moms, I am thinking of you as I know this time of year is a tough one. But, know that those of us who walked in your steps still have you on our minds. I know I haven't forgotten how it felt to be a Mom without a child. So, until that moment...

Pray. Wait. Hope. Endure.

I believe God will provide for you too.

Firsts

2009-04-24T23:39:00.003-05:00

As a parent, you get the opportunity to witness a lot of "firsts". First bath, first word, first steps, first friends, etc... In the past couple of weeks, we've had a couple of firsts that I wanted to get down before I forget. Speaking of forgetfulness, this is one of the reasons I blog... I have a horrible memory. I think that's why I scrapbook too - I've got to get these things down so I don't forget to share them with Gabe. I don't want to forget these day to day things that have been so special in our lives together.

We took Gabe and his friends, Will & Patrick, out to Mrs. Hoobler's (she is the local preschool teacher that everyone had - everyone LOVES Mrs. Hoobler!!) because she had 3 baby ducks and several baby kittens that she thought the boys would like to see. First of all, I love watching Gabe with his friends. Will & Patrick are older than him, but Gabe doesn't let their age stop him. He's always keeping up with them, tagging right along. Anyway, back to the baby animals... It was so amazing to see Gabe hold a baby kitten for the first time. He was so excited to hold one, but when we finally gave him one, he got a little scared and didn't really want to hold it. So, we held one of them on his leg so he could pet it. That worked out a little bit better. It was such a neat experience to see him just sit still and pet the newborn kitty. He was very gentle and you could just tell he was being cautious and taking it all in. I remember holding kittens as a child. There's nothing like the warmth of a baby kitten and the soft sound of their cry and wimpers. It was very sweet to see my son experience that for the first time.

Tonight, we took Gabe to Walmart - which is always a gamble (you never know how a 2 year old is going to behave) - and he was excellent! He had a great nap today, which makes a huge difference in how he behaves. Seriously. At Walmart, we told him we would take him for ice cream if he was a good boy. So, we were getting ready to leave, and like always, I had to stop at the restroom first. When I came out of the restroom, Greg and Gabe were standing at the water fountain getting a drink. Gabe was facinated by the water fountain! I had to stop and just watch him because up to this point, I don't think he's seen us use a water fountain. He kept telling Greg, "More...More, Daddy drink". It was so cute to watch him - he thought it was the coolest. Then, Mommy had to have a few drinks, then Daddy again...

Then, we drove through the car dealership on the way home - just to look. It never even crossed my mind that Gabe's never been through a car dealership. He didn't understand why Daddy kept stopping the car and getting out. Then, Gabe wanted out.

I guess I had just taken for granted all of these little things that are new to you when you're a child. It has been a joy watching my son experience all of them. It's been a joy watching the look on his face when he gets a new concept, or when he really likes something, or even when he really dislikes something. As Gabe's getting older, I'm finding that each age is coming with it's own challenges, but also it's own really incredible new stages. I didn't know that I would enjoy his toddler years this much - I really do love it. Yes, the toddler years are challenging and you have the tantrums to deal with. But, you also have new things like, "La U too Mom" or "Gabe do it" or "Peese just one candy right now?"

I'm so blessed to get to experience all of it.

What you can't see...

2009-04-19T21:55:00.002-05:00

What you can't see in this picture is Gabe's birth mom holding him and laughing right along with him. What you can't see is the huge grin on Greg's face and my face as I'm taking these pictures of them together.

What you can see, however, is a very happy little boy. A very loved little boy. As I sat and watched my son with his birth family tonight, I couldn't help but feel a ton of love welling up for them. I laughed as we quoted the same movies. I laughed even harder as his birth mom and I said the same exact random thing.

I can't believe this is my life. I have an amazing son. I have a wonderful husband. I have an awesome family. And, I have the privilege of knowing my son's birth family. I have the joy of laughing with them. I have the comfort of knowing that she's alright. I don't think I could handle not knowing how she was. I am so blessed. I am so fortunate. And, I am so glad that Gabe is the reason we all got together.

Reasons Why I Love My Abba Herrman

2009-04-14T22:03:00.002-05:00

She loves me Way Up to the Sky!
She plays "guys" with me.
She makes me bacon
She introduced me to Lion King and Nemo
She loves spending time with her Gabers
She let me decorate sugar cookies and get frosting all over her.
She's married to my PawPaw - and he's pretty awesome too.
She has an AWESOME tweet (treat) drawer!
She knows how important "guy time" is, so she calls my cousin Braden to come play with me.
She's my Abba...maybe if Abba Smith says "no" Abba Herrman will say "yes". Or vice versa!

To You, My Easter Bunny

2009-04-10T22:18:00.005-05:00

We had a great day today, buddy. Today we went to Abba Smith's work for their Easter egg hunt. You fell asleep in the car because it was right at nap time, so I carried you in. Everyone was ooing and ahhing at you as we came in because they thought you were so precious, asleep in my arms. I was really enjoying it because you don't stay still that long and want to cuddle much!

As soon as Abba saw us walk in, she woke you up to get you in with the other kids so you could find some eggs. You did great! You probably got 12-15 eggs. As soon as you found one, you wanted to sit down and open it up to see what was inside. Since they all had candy, you wanted to sit and eat it! We had to keep telling you to go find more eggs!

After the Easter egg hunt, we headed to Abba & PaPa's farm to go see PaPa and Uncle Dan. You had a great time with PaPa and Dan and talked them into giving you several treats. Including some chocolate-covered pretzels to take with you on the ride home. REALLY? Chocolate-covered pretzels IN THE CAR?? You can definitely tell when your parent has become a grandparent. Oh, and all of these treats right before SUPPER?? (I can definitely tell I've become a parent!) The treats didn't stop you... when we got home, you ate 3 pieces of pizza! All I can figure is that you're going through a growth spurt or something. Your appetite has really increased. Here are some of your favorite foods:

hotdogs
chips - you love chips - your favorite right now are baked BBQ
ce-dil (cereal) - you love Special K, Frosted Flakes, & Frosted Mini Wheats
Bacon - you LOVE bacon. This is a treat you like to have the most at Abba & PawPaw Herrmans.
Fruit - you still eat fruit very, very well - pretty much any kind
Ham
Pizza - pretty much a food you're guaranteed to eat.
Whoop - (Soup) You like Progresso's Chicken & Wild Rice - you can eat a whole can.

Those are just some of your favorites. Your appetite is increasing to more foods, but you love to snack. We have to keep a lot of animal crackers and those 100 calorie food packs around. "More Tweat Mommy!"

I love you little Gabers. Thanks so much for a great day together. As I say so often, "You make Mommy laugh".

Sugar Crash on the way home from the farm...

When we got home - you were all giggly - and chocolatey!

Love him.

2009-04-09T13:56:00.003-05:00

Love him. Love him. Love him.

Long Overdue.

2009-04-02T17:26:00.002-05:00

"See ya, Mom & Dad... I'm headed to Abba & PaPa's house."

Ok, I'm really sorry. After swearing to get better blogging, I have failed to do so. I'm having so much trouble finding free time for Flickr, Facebook, GabesMom, GregsWife... By the time I get to the computer at night, I usually only have time to work on my 365 picture for Flickr... I'm lucky if I always get that done!

Being a mom of a toddler has definitely been a lot of fun - all of the new things he's doing. Actually having a conversation with your kid - how awesome is that? For so long they can't talk and then it's like all of a sudden, they're speaking in sentences! I love being able to talk to him and hear the things he's thinking about. When he was a baby, I was constantly wondering what he was thinking. Now, he tells me! :) Another thing I like about this age is seeing him with other kids. It's especially cute when he's with older kids... He tries to act like them, to laugh like them - it's so cute seeing him try to be just like his older friends.

I have a few "just Gabe" things to share... The poor kid can't say "Smith". When he tries to say "Grandma Smith", it comes out as "Abba Piss". It's so funny!

Also, he is obsessed with directions now. If we don't turn the way he thinks we're supposed to turn, look out! Tantrum time! We hear, "No Mommy! Diff way!! (This Way) or No Mommy, Daff way!! (That way)". He knows the way to his grandparents' houses. If you try to take a different route, you're going to hear it all the way there!

Also, he can potty train all day at daycare, all day at "Abba Piss's" house, and the minute we get him home, he pees his pants. Then, he'll come get us and say, "Gabe did diss". One time, he peed on a book that was on the floor. Boys!

I promise to be a better blogger from now on... You believe me, right?

If you're a friend of Gabe's Dad... you're a friend of Gabe's.

2009-03-08T20:21:00.003-05:00

This is Gabe with Greg's friend Nolan (aka Buddha). Everytime Gabe see's Nolan, he yells, "Buddha!!!". It is SO cute. Gabe LOVES Greg's friends. He feels like big stuff when he's around them. He's even more fearless and daring. I love watching him with Greg and his friends. What a blessing that they all love him so much too. I am so looking forward to watching him grow up in their shadows... well, it'll be interesting! :)

And, we have an artist!

2009-03-03T21:42:00.002-06:00

Gabe LOVES coloring with markers. Love, love, loves it! I have really enjoyed watching him concentrate and really think about what he's making. He loves to say, "Mommy, Draw!" It's too too cute.

There's not really a whole lot going on right now, so I don't want to bore you all with a long post. Other than drawing, things have been pretty steady. Still working on potty training... Gabe doesn't really like to do it at home... he does great at daycare, but at home he thinks he needs a diaper. Still can't shake the nighttime baba. I think we're seriously going to just have to do something drastic. Ugh.

I hate to take it away from him. He loves his baba. He seems to be ahead of schedule on everything else, but this is one thing he wants to hold on to for comfort. I feel like a big giant meanie-head if I take it away. He cries huge tears, and dang it... I just can't take it away yet.

I just blogged to say...

2009-02-21T15:32:00.002-06:00

I love you! Gabers, you and I have had a great week together while Daddy's been on his trip. On his way back, you wanted to talk to him on the phone. I love watching and listening to you talk on the phone! It's the cutest thing. You love talking to your Daddy, your Abbas and Pawpas, and you love talking to whoever Mommy is talking to! ("Uh say Hi!") You also talk to your birth family and they love hearing that too. You're just growing up so fast, my little guy. I love you.

Random Thoughts on Being Two - to catch everyone up!

2009-02-18T21:11:00.007-06:00

Temper tantrums are becoming more frequent... and lasting longer...
Bedtime is becoming a little more difficult - Gabe watches a movie in his room, but decides that would be the best time for a #2 diaper.
We still can't shake that baba... even though it is mostly filled with water, he still wants it, scratch that - needs it.
Hugs and kisses are becoming more frequent. Especially in the last week. He's been very affectionate! It's been so nice.
He's started saying new things: "No Way!" when he doesn't want to do something. "Um, cuz..." when you ask him a question. "Why?" when he doesn't like the answer to a question (I thought this was supposed to happen later??)
His pretend play is SO much fun to watch. I love watching him when he doesn't know I'm watching. It is so neat to watch him play with his toys and to actually hear him say what he is thinking.
Potty training is going great - especially at daycare. He went 3 days in a row with no accidents AND waking up from his naps dry. At home on the other hand, he doesn't want to use the potty. We haven't been pushing it... we've heard when he's ready, he's ready.
Gabe's appetite is pretty narrow. Lately, all he wants is hotdogs and "putchet" (ketchup). He loves Special K cereal too.
He's recently taken an interest in drawing with markers and crayons.
He knows the shapes hearts, circles, triangles and sometimes squares.
Sometimes if he's in a bad mood, he tells me to "go away" and sticks his foot out and kicks. This was really, REALLY hard for me the first few times he did it. I found that if I let him see a hurt reaction, he knows he's found a weak spot. So, I just stand my ground and tease him and say, "No, you go away!" and then I tickle him and we laugh about it instead.

All in all, terrible 2's haven't been terrible, they've just brought on a whole new set of challenges. Even though it's a tough stage, I still love it. I love hearing my son talk. I love hearing him say "La Yu too, Mommy" when he goes to bed. I love watching him pray, and peek his eyes open every now and then. It was so cute the first time we saw him bow his head and then lift it up to see if everyone else was. Greg and I both asked each other after the prayer, "Did you see that? Were you watching him too?"

Even though this is tough, even though every day brings its challenges, I still find myself tearing up when I stop and think about how much I love this little boy. How when I stop and try and remember a moment without him, I can't. He's changed our lives so much. He's changed our hearts and our thought processes. He's made us a family.

Now that he's much more talkative, we've talked a little bit more about his birth mom. Every night before bed, I ask him:

"Who's tummy did you grow in?"
Gabe says his birthmom's name.
"Where did you grow with Mommy?"
Gabe says, "Mommy's heart."

In preparing for the adoption, we went through a lot of classes. We were taught to teach our children age-appropriate information about their birth parents. So, this is one way I've tried to approach keeping the adoption an open topic of conversation in our house.

One more thing about being two... With the introduction to underpants, Greg thought it would be a good idea to show Gabe how to put them on his head.

Just Thinkin'

2009-01-29T21:57:00.002-06:00

Gabe,
Tonight, I had dinner with some friends I hadn't seen in a while. I sure talked about you a lot. You know why? Because I am so very proud of you. I love you so much, big boy. I had a great day with you today. It's been so much fun watching you enjoy new things, watching you grow, watching you learn, etc...

Being your Mommy has made my life one full of joy and happiness. You and Dad are my world. I love you both so, so much.

I was just thinkin' about that and wanted to tell you.

All my love,
Mommy

How to have a birthday party like a 2 year old:

2009-01-23T11:04:00.010-06:00

1. You open up your presents! Gabe got a lot of really nice gifts from his family and friends. Some of them being: A Thomas train set, a Spiderman punching bag, a beautifully restored Radio Flyer wagon (that was Uncle Jeffy's and Uncle Jay's), a TV/DVD player combo for his room, some awesome clothes, bath stuff, a toddler to grown up chair, and many other things! Good think Aunt Keeker wrote everything down for me.

2. You get yummy treats! I put colored goldfish in a fishbowl and had cupcakes on a stand in addition to the cake.

3. You have punch. Oh, and decorations! Yes, this is fish tank gravel in these glass cylinders!

4. You have a birthday cake and candles! I made this Nemo cake with help from one of my very best friends, Tami Lyons. It was kinda stressful, but in the end I was really happy with it. The "seaweed" is white chocolate, colored & melted down and then piped out by hand to look like seaweed. I think it was pretty close! Putting the finishing touches on the cake was by far the best part of the process!

5. You blow out your candles and make a wish!

6. You have treat bags! I decorated these plain orange treat bags using my scrapbooking Cricut machine. It was a lot of fun. Next time though, I won't be putting names on the individual bags. I nearly had a panic attack thinking I was going to forget one of the kids and they'd end up without a bag. Or, that a kid would show up unexpectedly. Thankfully though, it worked out!

7. You eat cake - lots of it! Gabe did great with the cake this year - a lot less messy than last year! He really enjoyed it. It's fun to get messy and not have Mom & Dad worry about it! He kept dipping his Nemo into the icing so he could lick it off. It was pretty cute!

8. Make sure you get cleaned up! Gabe got started by licking all of his fingers off!

9. Have fun!!! Gabe got this "toodah" hat from Abba Herrman. She knows how much he loves Toy Story, so she wanted him to have a hat like Woody's. He looked so stinkin' cute in it!

We had such a great day with friends and family. We kept it smaller this year - only inviting immediate family, our Bible study group, and Gabe's best friends, Will & Patrick. It was still a house full of people. As I looked around that day, I was so thankful for every person there. They all love Gabe so much. I know I say this a lot, but as a parent, that's one of the greatest joys- seeing people who genuinely love your kid. Gabe is so fortunate to be loved by so many awesome people.

We've got a big weekend ahead of us! Tonight, we have my sister Lindsey's graduation from nursing school, tomorrow we have a surprise party, and Sunday Gabe's birth family is coming over for a visit. They were unable to make it last time due to the weather. It'll be a really fun weekend.

2 Years Old

2009-01-14T16:00:00.002-06:00

Happy Birthday, my big boy. I love you so much.

Thought I'd share some fun facts about Gabers at 2 years old:

Gabe is a snacker. He doesn't like a lot of veggies and he doesn't like pasta meals. He does, however, love fruit snacks, pizza, crackers, chips, pretzels, fruit, etc... He could snack all day long! We do provide him with mostly healthy snacks. If he sees Daddy with a pretzel, forget it... he's gotta have one.
He loves Disney/Pixar movies. Some of his favorites are The Lion King, Cars, Ratatouille, and Toy Story.
He also loves anything his buddy Will loves. Spiderman is big right now!
He loves playing with Playdoh. I have to say, it is a special treat... I hate getting that stuff out. Ugh. It just makes a mess!
When he wants something, he wants it right now. There's no "hang on a sec", or "just a minute", it's right NOW.
He loves lining his treats up and saying "look Mommy!"
He can pretty much repeat anything you say. And, most of the time it sounds pretty close to what you said! So, no more bad words!
He's been going potty on the potty chair quite a bit... and on the floor.
We're getting into the "No! Daddy do it!" or "No! Mommy do it!"
He likes to talk on the phone - but he has to hold it.
Frequency of meltdowns are increasing! He's getting a little temper!

We're having supper at Abba & PawPaw's tonight and then headed to Bible Study. I'm sure Gabe will have a great time hanging out with Abba & PawPaw and his buddy Caleb. I made cupcakes to take to small group. Party time on Saturday. More pictures to follow for sure.

2 Part Post - Jinx & Kicking

2009-01-11T21:39:00.003-06:00

Jinx & Gabe. They are quite the pair. This is a very rare photo opportunity here. Normally, if Jinxi is laying down on the couch or chair, Gabe is right up in her face either trying to kiss her, tease her with a pretzel or cookie, or trying to get her to kiss him. He loves to antagonize this dog. Most of the time, Jinxi is pretty cool about it and just gets up from her comfy spot on the couch and flops down somewhere else. This morning though, Gabe and Jinxi were actually watching The Lion King together.

I love the look on Jinxi's face here - it's almost like, "If I can't beat him, I might as well join him". Either that or, "Not Lion King... Again...".

Poor dog. I know I've mentioned this before, but she used to be the baby. She used to get all the snuggle time in the world. Now, it just seems like she lays low until 8:00, and as soon as Gabe's in bed, she's up on my lap. I love this ol' dog. She's been a great member of the family.

Tomorrow night, Gabe's birth family is coming over for our Christmas/Gabe's Birthday visit. I'm very excited to see them. Gabe is too! Tonight before bed, we looked at the photo of all of us in his room and pointed everyone out. I didn't even have to remind him of their names... he did a great job. I also asked him who was coming over tomorrow and he gave their names! It was so cute... He said, "No kick M. & J.". He's on this kick lately (pun intended!) of telling us who he's not going to kick. Today, he told me "No kick church". A lot of times, when I'm on the way home from work, I'll call to talk to him and Greg. Here's how the conversation goes:

Gabe: Hi Mommy!
Me: Hi Buddy, how was your day?
Gabe: Baby no kick Will.
Me: No, we don't kick our friends.
Gabe: Baby no kick Patrick.

And on and on... I swear we go through Abbas and Papas, the babysitter, just about everybody he knows. I guess it's good that he knows he shouldn't kick... Sometimes he'll say, "Baby kick Will" or whoever. We just remind him not to kick anybody... and then we do it all over again multiple times a day!

Almost 2

2009-01-10T22:55:00.007-06:00

It's so hard to believe it, but Gabe will be two years old on Wednesday. It seems like a lifetime ago that he became a part of our family. It seems like forever ago when this little boy was placed in my arms. Here are a few more photos:

Here, Gabe is 2 days old. We are at the hospital with him just taking in each moment with him. We had to remember that at any time, his birthmom could change her mind and decide to parent him, but we fell in love immediately. We couldn't not love this boy from the moment we saw him. He used to look for us in the hospital room. It's almost like he knew right away that we would be a family.

Here he is at 2 weeks old. Just starting to lose some of the blond hair he was born with. He was already starting to smile. He was already fulfilling every expectation and more of how it would feel to be a family. He made our house completely different. Our dog was a different member of the family now. Greg and I were changed. We were now "Mom & Dad" and no longer "Greg and Bri".

And, here he his on his first birthday morning. We made him his favorite breakfast at the time - pancakes with maple syrup bits. He was so cute, wasn't he? Still had some of that baby fat, still didn't have some hair... :o) He was so adorable. He was walking on his first birthday and already talking a little. I remember going all out for his birthday - not because I wanted to spoil him... I don't think spoiling is intentional - I just think you want it all for your kids. You just want them to have everything and be happy. I remember feeling really proud of him at his birthday and I remember watching him and thinking "wow... you are so perfect, so wonderfully made... So everything I had ever imagined and more."

Now, in 4 days, my baby boy is going to be 2 years old. I still just look at him and wonder how Greg and I could be so very blessed. I really believe when you have a heart's desire God will fulfill it. And, when He does, it's bigger and better than you could have ever dreamed. It surpasses all expectations of how wonderful you imagine it could be. I am truly thankful. Thankful.

My son wanted a hug and kiss in Walmart today. I noticed people walking by and either smiling widely or chuckling at how cute he was. He gives me a kiss and then he'll say "Ah Hug, Mommy!" Isn't that enough to make your heart spill over? I'm so thankful.

Gabe Fix

2009-01-06T22:06:00.003-06:00

Last night, my mom called me because she and Dad needed some "Gabe Time". It had been a week and she was starting to go into "Gabe Withdrawals".

"I need to see my Gabers."

I'm very thankful that all 4 of Gabe's grandparents love spending time with him (what's not to love?? :) ) It really warms my heart any time I see him with his grandparents. I love watching them laugh at him. I love when Greg's dad teaches him to say things. I love when he goes to Abba Herrman's and he has a favorite toy. I love that he associates tractors and machinery with my dad. And, I love that he knows he can talk my mom into anything. ("More tweets, Abba")

This is one loved little guy. And, we are very thankful, blessed parents.

Guys Weekend

2009-01-03T09:16:00.003-06:00

Gabers, I'm getting ready to head to Chicago for the night to see Wicked with Abba & Aunt Keeker. We're going to meet Aunt Ne and Uncle Rene up there for dinner. You and Daddy have already started your weekend together working in the basement. I'm upstairs getting ready and I can't help but chuckle listening to your conversations. You are such a good boy. Mommy's going to miss you while I'm gone, but I'm excited for you to spend time with Daddy.

Love you guys!

Toddler Christmas

2008-12-31T10:20:00.004-06:00

We had such a nice Christmas with our family. Since I've been such a bad blogger, I thought maybe I'd better give a Christmas recap! We spent Christmas Eve with Greg's parents, his brothers and their families. It was such a nice day. It's tradition to spend Christmas Eve with the Herrmans and Christmas day with my family. On Christmas Eve, we always have fondue with the Herrman family. Before Greg and I got together, I'd never had fondue! It's such a fun tradition, and I like that it's reserved for one time a year. It's always something to look forward to (as well as Mome's meatballs!)

Gabe got a lot of really great presents (our house suddenly got a lot smaller). It's always a joy to see him excited about something. He was very good with his cousins, even though he had a bit of a cold. We ended the evening with a reading of the Christmas story - the birth of our Savior. I love that Greg's parents have included that in Christmas Eve... I love to watch the kids watch Mary read it. All of the kids really listened... except for Gabe! He was playing with the Fisher Price Manger set (he was still in the same story!) and at just the right time, he pressed the angel to make the music play. It was cool.

We spent Christmas morning together opening gifts and stockings. Gabe's mom didn't have anything to open this year though... WHY? Was I on the naughty list?? No, quite the opposite! Santa surprised me a couple of days before Christmas with a Canon 40D! SO, I was taken care of for presents this year for sure! We got Gabe an easel as his big gift, the movie The Incredibles, a Toy Story magnet book, a couple of shirts, and a few other things. We read the letter that Santa wrote back to Gabe and checked out the cookie plate (sure enough, Santa had eaten the cookies!)

We also got Gabe this adorable train set from Ikea. He loved it. After opening gifts at home, we went up to my folks' house for the traditional breakfast casserole. It is so yummy! This year, my sister's fiance's parents were able to join us as well! They are such nice people. My other sister, Lindsey's, boyfriend Matt was there as well. We had a great time playing cards and joking around. Then, we spent some time opening gifts, and again, we all got a lot of really nice things. Mom spent a lot of time this year making our Christmas a sentimental one. She made us each a Christmas recipe book, a quilt, and she wrote out a mother's journal for us to share. The sentimental stuff is right up my alley... I love all of the thought that goes into making gifts like that.

Then, around 4:00, my mom's side of the family and Greg's parents came over so the cousins could see each other. We had a pretty good time with them as well. We played the traditional White Elephant game to Christmas trivia questions. Then, Gabe and I stayed the night and Greg came back to take care of Jinxi.

It was such a nice holiday. I am reminded so often of how very blessed Greg and I are. It is so uncommon that 2 families can share Christmas together so peacefully. I hear stories all of the time about terrible in laws or families in turmoil. I am so fortunate to have amazing in laws and a great family. It's exciting to see Jenny's fiance's family fitting in so well too. They are such kind people and it makes me happy that Jenny will have a great family life too. They just adore her, and as her big sister, well, I have to say that's all I can hope for!

I hope all of you readers (maybe like one or two of you?? :) ) are sticking with me! I promise to be more faithful in blogging in 2009! My friend Grant and I are going to attempt the Flickr 365 project of taking 1 photo every day for a year. Hopefully we can keep up with it! I think that will inspire me to blog more!

The Potty Tree

2008-12-21T07:30:00.006-06:00

This is the Potty Tree. The Potty Tree kind of happened by accident. Let me explain.

The other night, Greg was up at the office working and Gabe and I were at home. Gabe was in the tub playing and he stopped all of the sudden and said, "Mommy ah pee pee". I asked him if he went in the water and he said, "No! Ah pee pee potty chair!" Me, shocked, "You need to go pee pee in the potty chair??" Gabe, "YEAH!"

Ok, I've fallen for this trick before. I let him out of the tub, he takes off, running around the house naked, I chase him while he laughs...

But, he did say he had to go. It was worth the wet floor and chasing if I got him out.

And then, it happened. My son peed. On the potty chair. I swear... it was like a Christmas miracle.

I have never understood how parents can get so excited when their child goes potty for the first time. Now, I get it. I really get it. It was amazing! It was like a bunny running through the meadow on a beautiful spring day. Or, like the smell of fresh cut grass. Or, like witnessing a shooting star. It was like one of the coolest feelings in the world! I was so proud of Gabe. I couldn't believe he did it. AND, he TOLD me he had to go! He could've very easily just gone in the nice, warm bath water.

So, I was ready to give him every one of his Christmas gifts. But, thankfully, I remembered that I had gotten him these ornaments at Hallmark that night. And, I remembered that I had a small tree that I loved that I didn't know what to do with. So became the Potty Tree.

Each time Gabe uses the potty chair, he gets to put an ornament on his tree. We put the Handy Manny ornament on and he started freaking out because I wouldn't let him play with it! I thought maybe the Potty Tree wasn't going to work out, but eventually he forgot about Manny and calmed down. Here's Manny:

When you look at the tree, you'll see that there's actually quite a few ornaments on it. That's because I was really excited that first night and gave him both the Nemo set and the Handy Manny set. I couldn't help it!

Last night, I thought I'd try before bedtime to see if he would go. And guess what... We got #1 & #2!! Steve & Tami were over, so he was receiving extra praise. I think #2 was an accident because he kept running into the bathroom to try and go a little more! He was all about the attention! It was hilarious. Steve wanted me to take a picture of it and call this post "Twas the Deuce before Christmas".

Um, no. Gabe, I will not put a picture of your first poo poo on the internet.

Getting Ready for Christmas

2008-12-12T23:26:00.004-06:00

Gabers is starting to get ready for Christmas. It's been a little difficult keeping him out of the other kids' presents! He saw a Nemo gift I got for my cousin's daughter, Hailey, and he about flipped out! I actually may give it to him instead since I got her some AWESOME kitchen stuff from Ikea and Pottery Barn. She'll probably enjoy that more than Nemo.

It's been really hard not to buy Gabe everything under the sun! You just see all this stuff and you want to buy it all! I went a Pottery Barn store this week and it was like torture! :)

I'm so excited to spend this Christmas with my little family.

Here's one attempt at a Christmas Card picture for my Mom & Dad. Gabe didn't want to get his picture taken!

Thankful

2008-11-27T23:06:00.002-06:00

Dear Gabe,
Happy Thanksgiving, my wonderful little boy. I am looking at this picture of you with your cousin Katie and I am tearing up - again at the thought of how much I love you. You were such a good boy today. It was an absolute joy to sit back and watch you play with your cousins. Watching you with your family is always something I like to do. You're a Herrman. I can see it when you play. I can see it in the faces you make and the things you say. I can see it in your sense of humor. You have that playful mischieviousness about you that your Daddy has. You just fit, Gabe. You were meant to be a part of our family.

I'm so thankful, Gabe. I'm thankful that your extended family has always loved you and has welcomed you into this family, holding nothing back from the very beginning. I never imagined our extended families would do anything but love you, but it's a hundred times more amazing than I imagined. Watching you call everyone by name today made me stop and think, "Wow. This is his family and he loves them. He wants to chase Katie. He wants to be right next to Braden when he's playing video games. This is his FAMILY."

It continues to amaze me that God knew all of this. He knew you were meant to be with us. He knew that I would be capable of opening my heart completely to a child I wasn't able to carry. He knew he could prepare your birth mom to let you go and know you'd be loved. He knew when I didn't know. He knew when I doubted and thought I'd never be a mother. He knew. I'm so thankful today that He knew what I didn't know.

I'm thankful today for your birth mom. I have been thinking a lot about her today. I don't know if she'll ever be able to comprehend the joy that she has brought into my life. I've seen her with you Gabe and you have brought her that same joy. She is proud of you and so am I. I'm thankful that you have two families who love you more than words can ever say.

Happy Thanksgiving, Gabe Douglas.

All My Love,
Mommy

Super Nanny

2008-11-14T23:36:00.002-06:00

Ok, so we're having some troubles ... Gabers is not wanting to go to bed at night. Last night, he stayed up until 11:00. Thankfully, I was home today, so he didn't have to get up early, but we can't let that continue to go on... Yeah, we definitely need to put a stop to that!

I do find it really awesome that he wants to stay up with us. I think that's so great that he wants to spend time with Mommy & Daddy. However, once 9:00 hits, I'm ready for some downtime. I think as parents and as a couple you definitely need that time. Time to just chill out, time to talk, or time to watch a tv show that isn't Handy Manny or one of the three Disney/Pixar movies a certain little guy is obsessed with. Any other parents out there, do you agree??

It's not that I'm not 100% devoted to my child... I am. I love spending time with him. However, I think to be a better mom, I need some downtime as well. Time to recharge my batteries.

So, this brings me to the title of the post - Super Nanny. Tonight I watched an episode of Super Nanny that suggested a method of getting your child to go to sleep and stay in their bed. This boy on the show got out of bed nearly 100x before going to sleep! And each time, his mom had to pick him up and put him back in bed. She was allowed to say something the first two times she went in the room, but after that, she just put him back in bed. I've heard from a friend that this works too. So, tonight, that's what we did. Gabe was not happy at all. I went back up to his room every 5 minutes or so and silently placed him back in his bed. This went on for a little over an hour. The entire time he was yelling, "No! Mommy bed!" or "Mommmmmmmy!!!!". He was NOT happy. But, every five minutes, I'd go back up (he'd be standing at the gate to his room crying) and I'd silently put him back into his bed.

This was hard... really hard. Greg couldn't do it. He went up one time and was up there for several minutes. When I went up to see what was going on, Greg was holding Gabe, talking to him, a book was out... Um, HELLO!!! Super Nanny said not to do that once you decided it was bed time! I was crying because I felt like my efforts were shot. I felt like the bad guy.

So, finally after that hour, I went up AGAIN, and this time, Gabe was laying in his bed drinking his bottle. Ahhh.... finally! Now, we just gotta get rid of that baba.... (I'm making Greg do that one!)

I need some advice from you other Mommas out there... Have you had this issue with your kids? If so, how did you handle it? The Super Nanny way? Or, is that too mean? I know it was really, really hard for us. But, the end result was him going to sleep up in his big boy bed, by himself. Will he eventually get the hang of it? I feel like I'm always guessing/hoping that I'm doing the right thing for Gabe. Time outs have been going really well for discipline. I've been trying to get him to eat better. This parenting thing is tough!

But, it really, truly is worth every minute.

Too-Dah

2008-11-13T06:44:00.003-06:00

Ok, so this is just one of those moments that I didn't want to forget, so I had to get it down...

Gabe is kind of obsessed with "Shish" (Finding Nemo) and "TooDah" (Toy Story). A lot of the time, he just generalizes Toy Story as TooDah... meaning he'll call the movie TooDah, or he'll call the individual characters TooDah. Poor Steve and Tami didn't know what he was talking about when they babysat him for us!

Anywho... While on vacation, we went into like the hugest Disney store ever. I wanted to bring Gabe back a "prize" but didn't know what it would be. Then, I saw TooDah. That was the prize he was getting... no doubt about it! I gingerly carried TooDah through the airport so his cowboy hat wouldn't get bent up. I got a lot of looks from people there... like they thought it was my toy - like a comfort thing I couldn't live without or something! Come on people, I'm 29 years old... I do not need a woobie! So, TooDah made it home ok. Yesterday morning, after Gabe woke up, we thought we'd give him his TooDah. Here's the adorable part that I had to record (his response to TooDah):

"OH, BIG TooDah!!"

Greg and I just looked at each other and burst out laughing! It was SO stinkin' cute! We love you, Gabers... it's so good to be back home with you.

Grandma for President

2008-11-04T22:47:00.003-06:00

We want Grandma for President.

Our Handy Manny

2008-11-02T22:54:00.003-06:00

Just wanted to post a few more pictures of our little Handy Manny. He was so good for Halloween! He had a great time Tick or Teeting... He did great for not having taken a nap. However, he did fall asleep in the car between stops!

Happy Halloween!!

2008-10-31T16:15:00.001-05:00

Happy Halloween from our Punkin'! Can you tell his Dad is a computer geek? (and I mean that in the most loving way possible!)

Halloween Is Near!

2008-10-28T22:55:00.005-05:00

Here's the Gabers getting ready to carve a pumpkin with Daddy!

Gabe really doesn't like the pumpkin goop... We thought he'd love playing in it!

Remember this little fellow from last year???

Eh Hem.......

2008-10-24T22:22:00.004-05:00

We have a big boy bed!! After many, many (yes, many) nights of struggling in getting this big boy to bed, we broke down and purchased a big boy bed for him. Gabe was not liking his crib at all any more and always wanted to sleep in the spare bedroom ("daddy's bed!" as Gabe would say). Well, Mommy and Daddy sleep upstairs and the spare bedroom is downstairs. So, we'd let him fall asleep there, and then ever so carefully, I'd carry him upstairs to his crib. Most of the time I was successful in keeping him asleep. The nights I wasn't, he slept with me.

So, tonight is the first night in the big boy bed. Greg was gone when I put him to bed, so I took a few photos. When I showed them to Greg, he said, "That looks like a blog post to me!"... he knows me so well. Oh and guess what?! That bedspread is from Pottery Barn! I found it at a garage sale for $22 and it's in fabulous condition. And, it washes up great!

Also, I wanted to share a few "dactur" photos of my big boy. Notice here, he has the "bue dactor"... Ok, so it's really red, but all colors are blue, all numbers are 2's, and all letters are b's. I don't argue with him...

Anywho, this kid loves tractors. Loves them. My mom got him a small set from Big R and he seriously won't even put them down when he eats. He hates putting them up when he has to nap. We literally have to kiss them goodnight and put them up. Each one of them. It's too funny.

See these two little guys? One time, I pretended they were PaPa & Russell (Grandpa Smith and his hired hand Russell) while Gabe and I were playing. Now, he doesn't part with these either. At any given time during the day, he can be seen holding a mini pickup truck, a mini anhydrous tank, and these two guys. He calls them PaPa and Ussell. Can't wait for PaPa to hear that.

Well, better get to bed... Not sure if we're going to have a long night or not!

Playtime

2008-10-17T23:58:00.003-05:00

Today, we watched Gabe's friend Will for a few hours. Usually, when Gabe sees Will, he's with Greg doing Daddy/Son stuff, so I don't get to see them play together. It was too cute to watch them play. Will acts just like a big brother to Gabe and loves on him when Gabe gets mad about sharing toys. I got out the camera to try and get the two of them in a couple of pictures. They were hamming it up.

Sunday Randomness...

2008-10-12T22:48:00.005-05:00

Took Jenny & Rene's engagement pictures today... you can see more of them here.

When we ask Gabe to say Gabe Douglas, he says "Baby Dud-das"

I have a super wonderful husband that watched Gabe while I went to take the photos today.

In April my parents will be married for 30 years. crazy.

Gabe can say Hakuna Matata (HaKuKu Atata)

Gabe calls any figures (Care Bears, Lion King figures, etc) his "guys"

Do not ask Gabe to say "clock" or "chalk". You might be offended.

Today is Tamilamadingdong's birthday - Shout out, friend!

Had Baby Bull's cream of chicken soup tonight for supper... yum.

Had french fries thrown at my head tonight by my son.

I love Facebook.

Gabe has decided just recently that he doesn't like to sleep in the crib anymore... I think our next purchase is a twin bed.

Seriously, I gotta go to bed...

But, wait... I would like to share a photo of Gabers:

This is what happens when little boys think they're big boys and don't go to sleep... :o)

Good Night!

Ahhhh... I can breathe...

2008-10-10T21:25:00.002-05:00

Oh, little Gabers. It's been quite the week. You haven't been the best behaved little boy. You have tested my patience a lot. However, look at you in your Mommy's arms. You're happy. I'm happy. It seems like the rest of the week just melts away.

Gabe, I want to tell you, that if you choose to have children someday, it is the most wonderful, challenging, amazing thing a person can do with their lives. To be your parent, your Mommy, has been all of those things. Sure, there are bad days. But, the next morning, when you wake up and I come into your room to greet you, your smile and happy mood just erases the frustration that was the day before. I forget that you knocked me one with a toy tractor (right in the head!) when I wouldn't let you stand up in the cart. I forget that you pulled my hair because I picked you up to keep you from running away from me. I forget that I could barely stay awake the night before while you cried about having to go to bed.

God does an amazing thing for parents. No matter how challenging of a day you may have had, you can wake up the next day refreshed, thankful, and moved to tears at how much you love your child. We have so many more good days than bad ones, Gabe. It was just a rough week this week. Daddy was gone, you've been kinda sick and not sleeping well, of course you're cranky!

I just want you to know that you could never do anything that would change my love for you. I may get angry, I may get frustrated, you'll get angry and frustrated with me too. I'll always be your Mommy. You are my son, the child I prayed for, the child God brought into our family. You are so very loved by so many.

Good night little one, Mommy loves you and is looking forward to another great day with you tomorrow.

You Been Farmin' Long?

2008-10-05T14:45:00.008-05:00

This has to be one of my all time favorite pictures. I love love love that Caleb's Mommy wanted to come out to the farm with us to take photos of the boys. They were SO photogenic (for toddlers!!) and we got some AMAZING pictures. I am absolutely thrilled with how they turned out. This season has been one that I've been waiting for. From the time Gabe was really little, I knew he was going to be into trucks and tractors - he's always been a true boy. So, I knew when he was old enough to be walking and talking, that harvest was going to be a fun one. And it sure has been. Thursday night, we surprised Papa and stopped by the field to ride a couple of rounds in the combine. Gabe didn't want to leave! Then, Friday, we took Caleb and Darci out to the farm to get some pictures. Here are a few more:

Hey, Papa's down here... maybe if we keep walking, we can hitch a ride back in the combine!

See, Caleb, when I'm bigger, I'm going to be a farmer like my Papa.

Couldn't resist trying to get a picture of the boys' feet in overalls. I was hoping to get one with them walking in the grass, but that didn't work out so well. I'm happy with this one! And, it's gotten the most Flickr views! That's kinda cool! If you want to see even more of these pics, you can visit my Flickr photos here.

Darci and I are so blessed to have these two awesome boys. These boys were prayed for together. Darci felt Caleb move for the first time on the day we brought Gabe home from the hospital. When Darci held Gabe for the first time, Caleb kicked. God has truly blessed us with having boys that can grow up together.

Dress Shopping

2008-09-28T20:05:00.010-05:00

We got to go dress shopping with my younger sister Jenny yesterday. It was so much fun watching her try on the beautiful dresses. We couldn't believe it, but she ended up purchasing the first one she tried on! She looked absolutely stunning in it. We also picked out the bridesmaid dresses yesterday too. They are chocolate brown with a hint of champagne color. Sorry, but no peeking!

Because the bridal store was AWESOME, I was able to practice taking some wedding pictures there. So, I just took some random shots and thought I'd post them. NONE of the dresses you see here are Jenny's dress OR our bridesmaid dresses. Sorry! No peeking!

How in the world do people choose a flower girl dress? There are so many to choose from and they are all so adorable! When we got married 7 years ago, we had a friend of the family make the dresses, so we didn't even look at them in the store. I would've been overwhelmed.

I just loved the detail on this dress... just gorgeous!

Same with this one... When I got married, SO many of the dresses had a big bow on the butt! Thank goodness the dress makers are realizing that the last things that brides want on their wedding day is a big ol' behind!

We just had a great time with Jenny and her fiance's family. They are terrific people who love Jenny very much. It makes me so happy to see her so happy. I love that even though she lives farther away, she still has a great support system nearby. I am looking forward to getting to know Rene's family even more as we plan for this special day!

PS: Did I mention that Gabers is the ring bearer??

Matron of Honor Duties Begin!

2008-09-26T21:03:00.003-05:00

Gabe's Mom is heading up to Aunt Ne's to go dress shopping with Aunt Lindsey and Abba Smith. Gabe and Daddy are going to stay home and play in Gabe's new fort! I just love that he makes Greg get in there with him! We got a new dishwasher, so Gabers has a new playhouse!

I'm so excited to go up and help my sister Jenny plan for the wedding! Have a great weekend!

Cute Stuff

2008-09-23T19:54:00.005-05:00

Excuse the poor quality of this picture, but it was taken through our very filthy front door. I've tried, but it is impossible to keep clean with a dog and a toddler. Gabe LOVES pears. We have a pear tree here at the new house and Gabe just loves them - skin and all. He walks around the house saying "apple" and holding it just like a grown up would hold an apple. He's so stinkin' funny.

Gabe also LOVES the movie The Lion King. Seriously... Greg and I probably have the first 20 minutes of that memorized - word for word. It is SO cute to see him sit there in a trance watching it. We usually play it in the kitchen while we fix dinner and he sits in his high chair in a daze. He also does some of the actions (holding the cub up to the sunlight, silly faces Nala & Simba make, etc...) He also says "Scar", "Daddy!", and "It is TIME..". I just love it. Sometimes I'll stand at our kitchen island and just smile and watch him. He has no idea... he is so entranced.

Well, Gabe's Mom is exhausted. That is all for tonight!

Gabers Mini Photo Session

2008-09-21T19:56:00.011-05:00

One of my favorite things to do is to just grab the Gabers and go on a spontaneous photo shoot. Usually we take Daddy with us too so he can help me get Gabe's attention. Today, we went out to a farm and got some neat photos of Gabe by a wrought iron fence and in one of my dad's bean fields. He looked so ready for fall today in his brown courdoroy jacket. My little boy is growing up so fast. People say that happens, and some days it feels like they just grew by leaps and bounds over night.

I like this one - I just hope this is the only time I ever see him behind bars! :) I love the look on his face too.

Here, Gabe is tasting the beans to see if they're ready for harvest yet. We had to call PaPa tonight to let him know Gabe probably owes him some money for the beans! Gotta tease that PaPa.

I so wish I lived at this house - I love the wrought iron fence and the serenity of the place.

My lovely assistant, Greg, is doing his very best to get Gabe to smile for me. The tickley things work really well!

One of my favorites. My happy boy in the bean field getting ready for harvest. I can't wait to see him in the tractor with PaPa.

The little man.

And another favorite. Daddy taught Gabe how to pick flowers today - "you don't pick off just the petals - you pick them down lower and then give them to Mommy!" It was too cute to watch.

Gabe's Mom is Still Here!

2008-09-15T00:02:00.003-05:00

Ugh... I have not been a very good blogger, have I? I'm still here... In the past 2 weeks, I've had the following things going on:

A hubby on a camping trip.
A wedding.
A Gabers with a cold.
Planning, preparation, and attending of the first annual Momma Getaway.
A jam-packed work schedule (our new girl resigned).
Getting garage sale items ready.

So, yeah... it's been a pretty busy time for me! Anyway, on to the Gabers! I hope the picture at the top has given you a clue about the post. When Gabe was just a baby - a very teenie-tiny baby - my friend Tami and I went garage-saling (Nah! Not US!) and found this awesome Radio Flyer bike for Gabe. We've had it put up in the garage and we finally took it down this past week to see if he would like it. He really wasn't too interested when he found out he had to work at it a bit and Daddy wasn't going to keep pushing him! He hopped off and returned back to the "cauk" (sidewalk chalk) he was playing with. I had not gotten my camera out yet, so we persuaded him with a juice box to get back on so I could capture this on my camera. Ah, the powers of parental persuasion... If only it always worked! Would you like to see that picture? I thought you might...He's so cute, isn't he? This weekend, I held the first annual (possibly semiannual!) Momma Getaway weekend. My fellow Momma friends and I headed to a nearby church camp to rent out a cabin-like building to scrapbook, sew, talk, eat, and sleep as much as we wanted for the weekend. It was so much fun. I was able to share the weekend with 5 of my dearest friends. They are just the best. We had games and prizes, we had a couple of really late nights (3:00 am!), and we had a blast. I love these ladies so much. God has truly blessed me with some amazing friendships - I am so fortunate that my closest friends could all be in the same place for the weekend. You can read more about it on my other blog Greg's Wife if you are interested. Speaking of which, I'd better go so I can update that blog... it's been even longer since I've posted to that one!

Celebration of Life Day

2008-09-01T21:38:00.012-05:00

Today, we celebrated life. Nine years ago, my brother & sisters were in a near-fatal car accident. I blogged a bit about it here. We always try to get together as a family on this day to celebrate life - life that was saved, life that has changed, and life that didn't exist before. I just can't believe it's been nine years. So many memories come back from those days when Jenny & Dan were in the hospital. So many moments where we didn't know if we'd have them. So many uncertainties. When those thoughts come to mind, I do my best to push them away and remember that they're here. They're living a life that is so special. Life can forever be changed by a single incidence and my family is proof of that. Because of the accident, we don't take life for granted. Because of the accident we are so unbelievably close. Because of the accident, my family has formed a strong, loving bond with Greg's family. As much as that day devastated me, it has helped form me into a better sister, daughter, and mother. I am thankful for my suffering - it truly has shaped me and added beautiful colors to my tapestry. However, I can say that it was painful - so unbearably painful at the time. Praise God that only He can make something beautiful from it.

My awesome nieces and nephew with Gabe. They are so great in always willing to pose for me!

Gabers with his Abbas and PawPa's (we spell PawPaw (PaPa) 2 different ways!)

Today, we had a wonderful time. Greg's family - brothers and their families, as well as Greg's parents - all came out to the farm. We all had a great time. Good food, good fun, some photo ops, eucure, and a very well-behaved Gabers. What more could you ask for? Here are some pictures from my impromptu photo session:

My FAVORITE picture from today - Lindsey & Matt

My adorable niece, Julia

My other adorable niece, Katie

Aunt Lindsey, Gabe, & Uncle Dan

Grandma & George

Introductions

2008-08-30T23:27:00.006-05:00

Internet - Happy. Happy - Internet. This is Happy Gabe's favorite toy lately (well, depending on the day... he also LOVES his Handy Manny Toolbox and well, really anything he's NOT supposed to be getting into!).

Whenever Gabe plays with this bear, he brings it to me and says, "Happy!". He wants me to push the button. When you push the button, the bear sings Happy Birthday. The cool thing about this bear is that you can record your voice on it, so it says "Happy Birthday to _____". Well, when Gabe recorded it, he recorded "Mama". So, whenever he plays it, it sings Happy Birthday to me! Pretty sweet to have everyday as your birthday!
Internet - M&M mini's. M&M mini's - Internet.

Parents - I cannot stress enough, children (well, my child anyway) will do anything... let me rephrase... ANYTHING!!!... for M&M mini's. I've gotten this kid to pick up toys, put jammies on, eat dinner, etc... He loves these candies. Want to know a trick? Oh, this is bad... Only give them like 1 or 2 at a time and space it out quite a bit and they really think they're being rewarded a lot. And, one container lasts a few days. Is that bad? Only a few extra calories and sugars a day instead of a whole bunch. Oh, it is also a really good grocery store trick too! "You be good and we can get some CANDY!" I just hope I'm not enabling a sweet tooth...
Extreme close up... WAAAAAHHHH! Oh, yeah, and here's the Gabers! Isn't he getting to be so big?! I was trying to get him to lay on his belly and put his head in his hands, but he just kept getting really close to my second baby (um... my camera) and wanting to touch it. So..... This was the best I could do! He's so cute though, isn't he? Maybe I'm a little biased, but he's stinkin' adorable.

Gabe's Mom is headed to bed. Have a great holiday weekend!!

The Beginning - Part 3

2008-08-29T07:59:00.003-05:00

If you have been following our story, you'll know it's been awhile since I've written about the adoption journey that lead us to these doors. When I took this picture, Gabe's birthmom was in labor and I was pacing back and forth. Greg and Gabe's birthmom's brother were sitting and talking. I was pacing.

Let me back up a bit though. I left off here in case you want a refresher as to where we are. So, it's June, we're on the list, and we're waiting. Every couple of weeks, I email our agencies to see if there's any news, but each time they tell me that they will let us know. So, we spent a lot of time in June just doing things together and spending quality time with our friends. During June, we had a great little motorcycle day trip and I believe we went to Darci & Craig's cottage. Also, I was on LA Weightloss at the time and I had just lost 26 pounds. Things were going great. In fact, in July - July 18th - I found out I was pregnant.

I couldn't believe it. We weren't trying. We were very happy to be on the adoption waiting list - we were so excited to be adopting our first child. We really felt like this is right where the Lord had directed us. We thought it was His plan. Little did we know, His plan would include this pregnancy.

We were beaming. We couldn't contain our joy and didn't delay in telling our family. We told them that night. Greg's parents had a dinner for the farm and my parents were camping. Greg's mom and dad thought we were talking about adoption - we showed them a Harley jacket for a baby. My mom squealed. My dad actually had to tell my mom to be quiet because we were at the campground. Greg's parents came to the campground too. We got pictures together and spent the evening just saying, "I can't believe it."

I went to my first ultrasound at around 5 1/2 weeks and the doctor saw a flickering heartbeat. We were even able to hear it. My mom and Greg's mom were with us and we were all crying. I was shaking so hard from crying that they had to tell me to stop so they could hear the baby. I will never ever forget the sound of that beautiful heartbeat. The doctor told me he wanted to do another sonogram in 10 days to make sure things were going smoothly. Greg left in a couple of days for a motorcycle trip with his dad, so Greg's mom would be going to that appointment with me.

A couple of days after we found out about the pregnancy, we received a call from one of our adoption agencies that a woman was in labor and wanted to meet some couples. We really felt that we had to say, "no" because we didn't think it would be fair to the other families waiting to have a child, if we were to be chosen. Also, I don't know if we could've handled 2 children at once! To this day, I still think maybe my pregnancy saved me from a potentially bad situation - not that it was the reason I was pregnant, but it was a factor in saying "no" to meeting that birth mom. Maybe the birth mom would've chosen us. Maybe she would've changed her mind in the 2 week window that the state of Missouri has. Maybe the situation with the birth father would have been trouble. Who knows.

At the next doctors appointment, I was scheduled for another sonogram. I was so unbelievably excited. As soon as I found out I was pregnant, I bought a pregnancy journal and started a Mother's Journal for our baby. I wrote that I couldn't wait to see the baby again. When the nurse did the sonogram, she had a really hard time finding the heartbeat. She said she needed to call the doctor in. I knew immediately that the baby was gone. They didn't have to tell me. I knew. In fact, throughout the time I was pregnant, I think I always knew that I wouldn't get an opportunity to raise this child. Don't ask me how I knew... I just did. Mother's intuition, maybe.

The doctor came in and told me & Greg's mom the terrible news that I had a missed miscarriage. We were devastated. I will always remember that day. It's almost like I can replay it in my mind, but I'm watching it all happen from above - I know that probably sounds weird, but that's how I recall it. Greg's mom was absolutely fantastic. We had friends visiting, people praying, and others that would just hug me while I cried. I have never experienced something so painful in all my life. Greg and his dad came home and Greg and I looked at each other and just didn't know what to say. I had a procedure done and found out that there was nothing wrong with the baby chromosome-wise. This was good news, according to the doctor. To me, I was just even more frustrated. There was no explanation. No reason why our child was gone. I still grieve the child we lost. I still think of her every due date anniversary and every anniversary when I found out she was gone. Her loss was agony. I couldn't understand why God fulfilled the desires of my heart and then so quickly took her away. I don't think I'll ever understand that. I have blogged more about my thoughts on the miscarriage on my other site.

After a couple of months, we informed our agencies that we were ready to be back on the list. We weren't going to try the common infertility drugs like Lupron & Clomid again. We still felt like we were meant to adopt. Sure, we may get pregnant in the future, but right now, adoption was God's way. So, we were reactivated. And.... we wait.

I'm trying to decide if I should go on and make this the longest blog post ever... I guess I will. Grab a cup of coffee or a soda, and chat with me for a bit longer...

In January, we received a call from Adoptions of Illinois. There was a birth mom due with a little boy and she was 8 1/2 months pregnant. She was due very soon. The birth mom wanted to meet us after reading our profile. We were ecstatic. When Greg called me to tell me, I was sitting in the parking lot of our pharmacy. All I could say was, "Greg, we might have a boy. A son." It was Monday, and we were leaving for a cruise on Friday. Wednesday, 2 days after receiving the call, we met with Gabe's birth mom, mother, and best friend.

Instantly, we seemed to hit it off with them. We talked about movies, likes, dislikes, hobbies, discipline plans, goals, religion, etc... any big or little topic, we covered. They were all so easy to talk to. Greg and I had decided before we even walked in the room we were going to completely be ourselves. No "super parent" attitude. No, "we're the perfect couple". We wanted his birth family to choose us because we're us. That's the best thing we could've done. They liked us! That day, that room was filled with laughter, a few tears (from me when I talked about becoming a parent some day), and calmness. When we walked out of the room (I still can't believe I said this...) I said to Greg, "We nailed it! It went so well!" That totally seems to contradict the "be yourself" attitude we had when going in there. I think I was just so excited that I meant, "We did just what we said we'd do and they liked us! I think they may pick us!"

We didn't know for sure if we should go on the cruise since Gabe's birth mom was due so soon. She thought we should still go and she definitley wouldn't base her decision on whether or not we'd be here. So, reluctantly, we decided to go. While on the ship, (a week after meeting her) we received an email that Gabe's birth mom had chosen us. We were going to be parents. We told my parents first because we were on the cruise with them and then called Greg's parents. We also called Darci & Craig. We were so excited, we ran out of our room on the ship trying to find my parents. When we told them, mom squealed (again) causing our neighbors to open their door. When we told them the news, they handed us a bottle of wine and said, "Here, you need to celebrate!".

On our way home from the cruise, Thursday, one week and one day after meeting Gabe's birth mom, we found out that she had started to dialate. We were freaking out thinking we wouldn't make it home in time. We didn't know that a woman could dialate days before the birth! Friday night, my mom, my mother in law, and my sister in law went shopping with me to buy all the necessities for baby. It was so much fun. AND, overwhelming. I couldn't believe it. I was going to be a Mommy. That Sunday, just 11 days after meeting his birth mom, Gabe was born at 12:59 pm.

There you have it. Our Story. It's a great one, isn't it? Gabey, we love you and we couldn't have planned it any better than it unfolded.

Found Pictures - Nice Surprise!

2008-08-27T23:08:00.006-05:00

While we were at my parents' house visiting Monday night, I reached into my camera bag so I could snap a picture of Gabers and his Papa Smith. When I took the first picture... CRAP! No memory card! I had left it on our computer desk after taking pictures from it. But, then, I found one of the smaller cards that I used to use. One that doesn't have near the amount of room on it. So, I put it in my camera and snapped away.

When I got home, I put the card into my computer and found some pictures I'd forgotten I'd taken of Gabe before he was a year old. I'm guessing he was around 10 months old. Here are a couple of them:

What a pleasant surprise! He was so adorable, wasn't he? He still is... Now, he just looks so much more like a little boy than a baby.

I'm looking forward to a rather calm weekend. We don't really have any plans except for a cookout at my mom & dad's house on Monday. We always try to get together as a family on or around Labor Day - This is the anniversary of the accident my siblings were in, so we like to spend that time together. My parents invited my in laws too (including Greg's brothers and their wives & kids), which is awesome. I'm so fortunate that my family all gets along so well together. That's great for me and Greg, but even better for Gabe. Not many kids can have some of their holidays shared with both sides of the family. Greg's parents are always so great about including my family too. If my mom has to work a holiday, a lot of times Greg's parents invite my Dad and brother over to spend the holiday there, which is so thoughtful.

Gabe is really fortunate to have grandparents, parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, & friends that all love him so much. Seeing your child loved is one of the greatest joys a parent can experience.

Weekend Recap

2008-08-24T20:13:00.005-05:00

We had a pretty nice weekend. It started out Friday night with a dinner for Gabe with his PawPaw, Papa, Uncle Dan, and his two Abbas. We had them over to celebrate Gabe's adoption anniversary. We had a really nice time. I fixed lasagna, salad, and an apple pie (frozen, but hey, it was still yummy!). Greg's mom brought some cucumbers in vinegar and homemade pretzels. My mom brought deviled eggs and star cupcakes.

Even though we didn't expect any gifts, both sets of grandparents brought Gabey a present. PawPaw and Abba got him an awesome Handy Manny tool set - which he loves! We have now learned the Handy Manny "Hop Up Jump In" theme song forwards and backwards! He has been playing with that all weekend. Papa and Abba got him a tractor with dual rear tires, oh, and it ALSO makes noise! He loved that too. Most of all, he just had a blast with his grandparents, which was what the whole evening was about. He entertained them all by saying, "ah happy!" several times, as well as yelling, "MommmmEEEE" when I went in the kitchen to get him a hotdog. I guess he's not a fan of lasagna.

Saturday, we played with his new toys and in the afternoon Gabe's Dad let me get groceries and do a little scrapbook shopping. It was nice to get groceries by myself and take my time. I also got some SWEET scrapbooking things that I'd had my eye on. We had pizza for supper and then watched Prom Night - kinda lame, but we watched the whole movie.

Today, I met with the engaged couple whose wedding I'll be photographing. I was really nervous about this meeting. Once I got there though, things went very smoothly. I liked the couple and I felt very confident in stating my responsibilities for the wedding day. Both were very nice and even took me to the site of the wedding so I could get a feel for what I'd be in for that day. I was actually quite relieved when I saw the site. It looks like we'll have plenty of light and we'll be right near downtown, so we may even be able to take some outdoor shots if the weather is nice enough.

Oh, and here we are with our Gabers:

To you, love Momma

2008-08-20T20:50:00.003-05:00

Dear Gabe,
Today is your day. When we asked you this morning "Is today YOUR day?" You smiled at us and said, "Che-yeah". Today is the anniversary of the finalization of your adoption. One year ago today, you legally became a part of our family.

Gabe, we are not celebrating this day because we became a family that day, because we did not. We became a family the minute we met you. You were forever a part of us from that moment. We are celebrating today, just as a reminder of how very special your part in this family is. How Daddy and I cannot begin to remember our lives without you in them. We are celebrating how very thankful we are that all turned out well with the court proceedings, how God blessed us and kept you with us.

When we were waiting for a baby, a child that was a perfect fit into our family, we prayed for you. We prayed for your birthmom and birthdad. We prayed that God would keep you healthy as you grew in your birthmom's tummy. We also prayed that you, the child God intended to be a Herrman, would be a perfect fit. It's still so amazing to me how God was able to hand select you, me, and Daddy to be together as a family. Seven years ago, when we started trying to have a family, God already knew that YOU were the baby we would wait for. He knew that we needed you.

Gabe, we love you so much. As I'm typing this, I'm crying, thinking about how very much I love you and how much of a miracle your adoption has been. Because of one perfect, very loved baby, Daddy and I have a family, a wonderful relationship with your birth family, and joy beyond words. One tiny baby has brought two families together. One tiny baby has brought his grandparents so much delight. One tiny baby is growing into a big boy. My big boy.

Tonight, when I put you to bed, we had a bit of conversation. First, we said our prayers. Then, I covered you up and said, "I love you love you love you, baby". And you said, "La Yu. Ba Ba?" So, I gave you your bottle. As I was leaving your room, I said, "Sleepy Good!" and you said, "La Yu!" Gabe, to hear you say love you is the sweetest sound in the world. My heart is overflowing.

I love you, Gabe Herrman. You are so loved - never forget for a minute, you didn't grow under my heart, but in it.

All my love,
Momma

Gabe's Day

2008-08-17T20:39:00.004-05:00

It's hard to believe that this Wednesday will be 1 year since Gabe's adoption was finalized. It's hard to believe STILL that this awesome, totally fun, "appy" boy is ours. As I think back about last year, I think of all the dread, the hurt, the wonder, and the pain. I think about how proud I felt on the witness stand to say, "Yes, he is MY son". I remember tearing up while the lawyers questioned us: "Will you always love this child?" "Will you treat this child as any other child you may have naturally or adopted in the future?" "Do you realize your child will inherit from you, just like a naturally born child?"

I remember being kind of insulted by the questions. Part of me felt like saying, "He was mine from the moment I met him." Because he was. That child captured my heart the very minute I saw him through the double door windows of the maternity ward at the hospital. I could see that he was long, red, and screaming! He was mine when I held him and wept because our dreams finally came true. He was mine when I fed him for the first time. He was mine when we laid him on the hospital bed just to look at his precious face. He was mine when he turned his head when he was a day old towards our voices. Somehow, he knew us. Somehow he knew to look for us - that he would be safe, loved, and treasured forever.

I cannot begin to imagine the tender moments Gabe's birth mom spent with him in the hospital and the time she had him at home. All I know is that he captured her heart as well. She will always, always love him. I just wanted to make it clear that she spent a lot of time with him as well. She bonded with him. And, still, he continues to capture her heart too.

On Wednesday, we will celebrate as a family, Gabe's special day. The day it became legal and final. But, to me, it wasn't August 20th really that he became mine. It was January 14, 2007 - the day he was born. The day we met. The day I'll never forget - the day I became a Mommy.

Gabe, I "la yu" way up to the Stars,
Mommy

'Cuz I'm So Happy...

2008-08-10T22:07:00.007-05:00

Concentration

I think my son has learned the cutest thing ever. I SO wish our video camera's battery was charged so we could tape this for you and play it because it is SO cute. I will work on that - we can't find the charger! Wanna know what he does? Today I bought him a Veggie Tales CD that has the most common Sunday school songs on it. It has the one "Down in my Heart" (way down in the depths of my heart *where?* Down in the depths of my heart...") Then they sing "And I'm so happy..." So, while that part was on, I started dancing and singing it to Gabe (yes, I'm thankful our video camera wasn't available for that part!) and Gabe says, "ah so appi!" Oh my gosh. Talk about the cutest ever. I ran us both downstairs and said "Daddy, Daddy, you gotta hear this!" Then, we called Abba and PawPaw Herrman and had him do it for them. Then we called PaPa Smith and left a message with Gabe saying it for him. Then, we called Aunt Ne.

Oh, this kid! Probably one of the most amazing moments is to know that your child is happy. I was able to see that quite a bit this weekend. Gabe's Dad took care of Gabe quite a bit this weekend to give me a little "me" time. I was able to get groceries, get the house picked up (it's already a mess again, but that's ok - it felt good while it lasted!), and even get some things planned for the Momma Retreat I'm going on with my girlfriends. I have the best husband. Seriously. He is so good with Gabe.

Today, Gabe's Dad let me go back to bed and they ran to town to get some things. They came back with an alligator pool that they got on clearance at Menards. $12 sure bought this kid a lot of happiness today. I bet it also had something to do with the fact that he was playing with his DaDa and PawPaw and Abba came to see him. Gabe's Dad also let me run with Tami today too. It was just nice to get out with my friend and have some spontaneous girl time. All of the pictures in this post are from the alligator pool. Wanna see some more?

Had to include this one too - this is how Daddy's morning started out! Yesterday, mine started with Gabe body-slamming me - WWF style.

Summertime

2008-08-08T11:57:00.002-05:00

Last week, Little Gabers was invited to his first Splash Party. He had so much fun. So did I. I loved watching my little guy play with all the other kids. I loved watching him just stare at the older kids with amazement. He's so cute. Look at that little belly.

When we got to the Splash Party, Keith - the dad in charge - said, "Can I take him?" Um, yeah! Go for it! Keith took him down the slide, showed him all of the activities, and then when Gabe went to his garage door and said "Jucsh", Keith went in and got him a juice box. Greg often takes Gabe down to Keith's garage to visit - ya know, guy time. So, Gabe is used to going to Keith's for a jucsh box. I thought it was funny that he remembered where to go and that he knew exactly what he wanted at Keith's house. Keith's wife, Beth did an awesome job of organizing the splash party with games, snacks, and rules (because with 20ish kids, you need them!) I'm so glad Gabe was invited to have a fun summer day!

Lately, we've been dealing a lot with temper issues, hitting, and biting. Basically, when he doesn't get his way, he either hits or bites. Not fun. As a parent, the hardest thing so far has not been the lack of sleep, the poopy diapers, or the eating challenges. Nope, it has been disciplining. There are times when we say "no" and Gabe just looks right at us and does it anyway. There are times when we have to let him throw a tantrum and just ignore it - this seems to work the best. He gets mad, then gets really mad when you're ignoring it, and then he's over it. I figure as long as we're keeping him safe from harm, this is probably ok. I don't want to draw attention to the behavior because then he knows it gets our attention. Ugh. It's tough.

Last night, I asked him if he loved me & Daddy. Usually he says, "yeah" or "Cheyeah". Last night he said "uh uh". Oh, that was hard to take. He's never said that before. I realize now that he was just mad at us, but ouch. Ouch. I know, I know... this is the first of many times that our child will hurt our feelings. That's another hard thing about being a parent - you give and give, you sacrifice, you go without sleep, you put them above all of your needs, and then they tell you "uh uh." That's tough.

However, God certainly knew what he was doing when he made the relationship between a parent and a child. He blessed us with those tender moments - when little boys want to be held by their mommy, when children say "La You" for the first time, when parents watch their children sleep. These are the moments that make it all SO worth it. These are the moments we waited for. The stinkerness, the poopy pants, the hitting and biting are all phases (hopefully) and God gave us these little blessings to help us get through it. When I watch Gabe sleep, sometimes I am so overwhelmed with love for him that I almost feel like my heart is going to overflow. I tear up many nights watching him over his crib and praying for him.

Forgive me for rambling... Sometimes it helps me to talk it out.

Why We love Grandma

2008-07-29T23:17:00.004-05:00

She lets me wear her "clock" (watch) and I don't like to take it off!
She always gets me new jammies.
She "la yu" so much.
She fixes me pb & j and carries my high chair out to the garage.
She Gaber-proofs the house when she knows I'm coming over.
"There are no rules at Grandma's house" - Grandma Smith
She makes me toast in the mornings.
She sings songs to me.
She loves my family so much always puts herself last.
She lives with my PaPa - I can't help it... I love the tractors!

Grandma, your Gabers just wanted to tell you how much he loves you and he's so glad that he's got the bestest Grandmas in the world. He loves you both up to the stars & the sky!

Wish I Might

2008-07-27T22:36:00.004-05:00

In an effort to do more of what I love, I am turning my hobby of taking photographs into a small business... when I say small, I mean I'm just starting out! Right now, I am in the process of creating my portfolio. I'd love it if you readers would view some of my portfolio photos HERE to provide any comments/feedback to this new photographer! I just love taking pictures so much, that I decided I would try and make it official. I have a self-proclaimed "geek" for a husband, so he's going to help me build a website. There are so many steps in doing this, I know it's way off before it's official, but hey, I have a logo! Would you like to see it?? Twist my arm... Ok here it is:

Thanks for checking out my pics! I'll keep you all updated on the progress. Thanks to all of you who have encouraged me so far - You have given me the confidence to do something with what I absolutely love.

Random Things I Didn't Want to Forget

2008-07-25T15:36:00.005-05:00

My son got his first pair of "big boy" Spiderman shoes the other day. They light up! He looks adorable in them.

Gabers went to the doctor yesterday for his 18 month check up and he weighs 29 lbs, 1 oz. The doctor advised that we switch him to skim milk! (90th %tile for weight!)

While at the doctor yesterday (Gabe, this is a story I promise not to tell your future girlfriends...) Gabe had a, how you say, BLOW OUT! All of the kids in the waiting area were looking at Gabe and laughing (ok, I was laughing too) because it was very audible. Seriously, it was loud.

We are down to one nap a day. Ugh.

Gabe's vocabulary has exceeded 30 words. He can now say baby, letter, football, puppy, and ow! Sidenote: he likes to say "ow" when he hits/headbutts me.

He had one of his only time outs at daycare the other day... he pushed a little girl off the Little Tykes slide. Ugh.

He's becoming more and more aware of going potty. He knows when there's something in his diaper. My friend Darci told me about this and I want to get it for him so badly... even though I know it could end up with poop in it... It's so cute!

Yesterday, I purchased the book The Girlfriend's Guide to Toddlers. So far, it has been pretty comforting for me. I get kind of frustrated sometimes how fellow moms don't admit how stinkin' hard being a mommy is. Especially a mommy of a toddler. It's tough. You love them SO much, but sometimes, you just can't wait for them to go down for their naps, or to go to bed for the night, or for them to play with Daddy when Daddy gets home for the day. I know... that probably sounds bad. But, during those times, you don't have to stop what you're doing every 3 seconds and make sure they're not into something! Like today, for example, Greg came home from work for a couple of minutes. I thought HE was watching Gabe and he thought I was watching Gabe. Greg came into the living room and Gabe was using his rocking horse to complete an Evil Knievil manuever onto the couch! Ugh. Boys.

I'll survive the toddler stage. Yeah, sure I will. No, really, I will! Really! Other people have made it.... :)

Back from Camping

2008-07-20T22:04:00.005-05:00

Love this picture of my little Gabers. This is him at the campground absolutely zonked out from all of the activity. He had so much fun. Both of his Papa's were there, Aunt Jenny & Uncle Rene and Aunt Lindsey were there too. He was a lucky little boy this weekend to have all of that attention. We had such a great time camping with our family this weekend. I'm just so happy that it is something we can do together.

When we were growing up, my parents took all of us on several camping trips for vacation. One of the most memorable ones for me is when we went through Tennessee, Louisiana, and Texas. This was the year my Grandma Smith died and we took my Grandpa with us. We spent Christmas in the camper. I'll never forget seeing the awesome plantations in Georgia, Graceland in Tennessee, Galvaston Island in Texas... it was just awesome. Dad always found neat places for us to visit. I'm so thankful that we will be able to do these kind of trips with Gabe. I have some wonderful memories camping and it's so great to know that we'll be able to give him that too.

While camping, the last couple of weeks, we've noticed that Gabe's vocabulary has really started to increase. He is now saying these words (and I know I'm leaving a few out):

tractor
PawPaw/PaPa
Momma (now also Mommy)
Dada
Abba, GaGa (Grandma)
Jenny
Cookoo (Keeker)
BaBa
Juice (Juish)
Oh Big Tractor
GiGi (Jinxi)
Love You
Yeah (CheYeah)
Uh-Uh
Uh-Oh
PeePee
Poop (Boop)
Car
Clock
Cow
Two
Chalk
Ketchup (Chetchup)

Along with those words he also does animal sounds for a: monkey, cow, horse, dog, cat, lion

He also knows how to point out his body parts: nose, mouth, hair, teeth, weiner (yes, we call it a weiner), fingers, toes, eyes, etc...

He sometimes knows his colors, but that's off and on. We just can't believe how much he picks up. He's so smart! It seems like lately, he's really changed so much.

Wednesday night, we had his birth family out to the campground for a cookout. It's something we've talked about doing since we got the camper. We had a great time with them. The above picture is the frame I painted at the pottery place for Gabe's birth mom's birthday. I do always get a little nervous before seeing them each time - not because of any pressure THEY put on me, but because of unnecessary pressure I put on myself. I worry that they'll think we're trying to be the "perfect parents"... basically I worry that we'll come across as phony or too happy. Well, we are really happy! Once they arrive, I find that all my fears were silly because they never make me feel like that at all. They always make me feel like we're doing a good job. They also do a great job of letting us know that they couldn't be happier in their decision in choosing us. It has all just worked out so well.

I'm so thankful for Gabe's sake (and mine as well) that they have wanted to be a part of his life. He is such a very blessed little boy. I know how much they love him. I could see it in their eyes as they placed him in my arms 18 months ago. But, now, because they've chosen to stay in contact with us, he'll see it too. As his mommy, I am so glad that he will know how many people love him. He will know that he is special - he has more family than most that think he's the top dog. I don't ever want him to doubt how very much he is loved and I know by staying in touch with us that his birth mom doesn't want him to doubt that either. It's not an easy thing to do to see the child that you placed for adoption every three months. It wasn't easy to place him in another home. She has taken the tough road and she has sacrificed for him. I will forever be thankful for her courage, friendship, and gift of motherhood to me.

Well, this post has become way too long, and I'm ready for bed. Sorry it's been a while since I've updated. We've been camping, and well, we were roughin' it! :)

Campin'!

2008-07-13T21:29:00.009-05:00

We went on our first camping trip this weekend and it was definitely unforgettable! Friday, Greg took off work at noon and came home so we could start getting ready. I never realized how much work it is to prepare the camper, pack the food, pack the bedding, etc... For years, my parents did this for us kids and until now, I never realized what a big job it is. We got out to the campground a little later than we'd hoped due to not having the battery charged enough, but that wasn't a big deal... just a little frustrating at the time. Greg and his dad got the camper backed into our spot relatively easily, so that was good too. We had some trouble right away though, when we found out that the air conditioning wasn't working. This was not good news for me & Gabe! We both have similar heat tolerance issues!

Gabe & his "funny face".

Campin' breakfast - Pancakes & Sausage

(& Ketchup - Gabe'll eat anything with ketchup on it)

Long story short, Gabe and I went back home to sleep (thankfully we are not very far at all from the campground) and Greg stayed at the campsite with the repairman until 12:30. Then, Gabe's Dad was up really early because he couldn't sleep. We all headed back to the campground yesterday morning and enjoyed a delicious breakfast of pancakes and sausage that Gabe's Dad made. We spent a lot of the day inside the camper playing with Gabe, watching Toy Story, organizing the camper (Greg's parents had furnished the camper and we took some time putting things where we knew we'd find them). Once it cooled off in the late afternoon, we took Gabe to an awesome playground area that was perfect for toddlers. He had a great time but was totally worn out!

Gabe had a blast emptying Jinxi's water dish - onto himself.

After Gabers went to bed, Greg and I enjoyed an awesome campfire and a spectacular sunset. We had the opportunity to just sit and talk - he on his laptop and me playing my handheld Yahtzee game. Greg had music playing lightly and we just sat and talked. Since becoming parents - especially parents to a toddler - our relationship has kinda been put on the back burner. Often times, there isn't time for "us" anymore. So, it was really nice to just sit and talk - to rediscover my best friend. We absolutely crashed once we turned in (with the air conditioning set REALLY COLD) and had a great night's sleep. Gabe was so worn out that he slept all night too. Camping sleep is great.

So, were we roughing it? Ummmm.... air conditioning, laptops, Yahtzee, well.... Maybe not, but hey, if you don't have to, why do it? We had a fantastic weekend as a family and I am so looking forward to many more trips like this one.

PS to Gabe's Dad: Are you cooking something?
PS to Julia: Happy Birthday, Nutroll!

Julia Marie - 7 years old

The Cousins: Katie, Gabe, Braden, & Julia

Little Lamb

2008-07-06T20:17:00.004-05:00

Wanted to share this picture of my little lamb sleeping. He's just so precious. I love how he just fell asleep and it looks like the bottle just fell out of his mouth. This kid was tuckered out. He got up at 5:30 this morning and only took a mid-morning nap - no afternoon one. He was an excellent little guy today.

Also, had to share this. The quality of the picture isn't the best, but I had to blog about the latest toddler entertainment. When we're sitting at the computer, Gabe will come up to our chair and say "Dactur!" I guess I should explain a bit... A few weeks ago, to keep Gabe entertained, I pulled up Google Images. I searched for tractors... Thus began an addiction for Gabe. Now, anytime we are at the computer, he wants to see tractors! It's so very cute! When he sees a bigger picture, he'll say "OH, Dactur!" (Translation: "Oh, Big Tractor!")

Well, Gabe's mom is going to turn in for the night... Heading to the couch to watch Design Star! Yippee!

Behind

2008-07-06T00:03:00.005-05:00

I'm really far behind right now. There are so many new things that Gabers has been doing. One of the funniest things is he says "Uh Oh, Spaghettio!" Except it comes out like "Duh oh, Dada!" He also says "Oh, Big tractor!" But, it comes out like, "OH, Dactur!" It's just the cutest thing. In fact, the other night, we had to call both sets of grandparents just to have them listen to him talk. Papa Smith got a big kick out of "Dactur". He also says "I love you" and that comes out as "Dah Doo". I don't think I'll ever get tired of hearing that. It really is just the most precious thing.

We're getting our Gabers back. He's been behaving a lot better than he was. He is still having some behavior issues, but at least now we feel like it's just normal behavior - that he's not sick or anything. He had a fever last week when the tantrums were going on, so we think he just wasn't feeling the best. Poor guy. They don't know how to express themselves at this age, so they kinda throw these little fits. I guess if I was trying to tell people I didn't feel good and they didn't get it, I'd probably throw a fit too!

We have just really been enjoying watching him do all of these new things. He's so funny. He's recently learned his colors - this totally shocked me! He will point to the wrong color when you ask him to point to one and then he'll laugh because he knows its the wrong answer! How smart is this kid! He definitely has his Daddy's sense of humor and mischieviousness! It's so funny how I can see a lot of Greg in his personality. He's smart, funny, a prankster, and gentle. If Jinxi's laying down, he'll come up to her and just give her a hug. Adorable!

Well, I've got a busy couple of days coming up... I'd better head to bed! Ok, one more picture... if you insist...

PS: Yes, we did have him on the train tracks... I hope this doesn't show bad parenting skills... We do have good listening skills. He was completely safe!

Out on the farm

2008-06-30T21:48:00.003-05:00

So, I had all intentions of shooting Gabe's 18 month pictures myself tonight, but it didn't quite happen. Let's just put it this way... Right before we left home, he had just ended a 30 minute tantrum. So, that was fun. We almost didn't go to see PaPa at the farm! I love this picture of him at the bridge. Check out my Flickr account to see more pics!

The Crayon Bowl

2008-06-28T14:52:00.003-05:00

When I was little, my Grandma Smith had this handmade bowl that she kept our crayons in. It looked like it had been homemade clay that had been formed into the shape of a bowl (the clay had speckles and grit in it) and then glazed or fired so it was shiny. The top edges of the bowl were rough and uneven. It was pretty ugly to be completely honest. However, I do remember that bowl as being something I could always find at Grandma Smith's house. I also remember the smell of their home. It was a wonderful aroma and when I catch a whiff of it now, no matter where I am, I think of the many meals and gatherings we shared there. I don't know whatever happened to the bowl, but I'll always remember it.

I decided that Gabe should have a crayon bowl like I had. One that's handmade, kinda ugly (don't look to closely at mine please!!), and one that will hold a lot of crayons. So, I knew when we went to paint pottery last night that this is what I'd be making. My niece, Katie showed me the area with the stencils and as soon as I saw the one with all the farm animals, I knew I had to use that one. I'll post some pics when I pick it up... It should be ready in a week or so.

I really wish Gabe would've had the opportunity to meet my Grandma Smith. I was only in the 3rd grade when she passed away, but her life has had a continuous impact on mine. She's the person I most want to be like. Now, I don't know if that's due to my memories of her, or due to my parents speaking so highly of her, but from what I gather from all who knew her, she was the kind of woman that I want to be. Since Gabe didn't have the opportunity to meet her or my Grandpa Smith, I want to pass some things on to him, from them to me, and from me to him:

Always turn the handles on pans to the back of the stove so little hands don't reach up to the pots. (she told me this one time when I reached for a hot pan)
Always work hard
Up, Up, Up We Go, In a Pan of Baking Dough...
Pete & Repeat
I love you, a bushel & a peck...
Say Say oh playmate, come out and play with me...
Always read the Nativity story at Christmastime
Mix saltines with ice cream (so good)
If you don't like mashed potatoes, mix your corn in (YUMMY) - I can't believe I didn't like mashed potatoes when I was little)
Mr. Bubble is THE best bubble bath - no ifs, ands, or buts.
Gotta see a man about a dog (Grandpa would say)
Are you eating too many mashed potatoes? (while tickling a child)
Splashing in puddles
Plant a tree when someone you love dies
Water that tree with dedication and love (Grandpa did this when Grandma died)
Never give up on your children
Go to church
Love the Lord without ceasing
Sweet Violets

I wonder if she ever knew what an impact she had on me. I will end with this:

There once was a farmer who took a young miss
In back of the barn where he gave her a
Lecture on horses and chickens and eggs,
And told her that she had such beautiful
Manners that suited a girl of her charms,
A girl that he wanted to take in his
Washing and ironing and then, if she did,
They could get married and raise lots of

(CHORUS)

Sweet violets, sweeter than the roses,
Covered all over from head to toe,
Covered all over with sweet violets.

The girl told the farmer that he'd better stop
And she called her father and he called a
Taxi and got there before very long,
'Cause someone was doing his little girl
Right for a change and so that's why he said,
"If you marry her, son, you're better off
Single because it has been my belief,
That marriage will bring a man nothing but

(CHORUS)

The farmer decided he'd wed anyway,
And started in planning for his wedding
Suit, which he purchased for only one buck,
But then he found out he was just out of
Money and so he got left in the lurch,
Standing and waiting in front of the
End of this story which just goes to show,
All a girl wants from a man is his

(CHORUS)

A little explanation

2008-06-27T13:43:00.003-05:00

I think maybe the reason Gabe's been so difficult the last week is just plain and simple, he doesn't feel good. The day before yesterday, he had a slight fever and today, his fever is up to 100.5. He is also sleeping A LOT. He slept in until 9:00 this morning - WOW! And, he's napping now. You can just tell by looking at the little bugger that he doesn't feel well. I'm not quite sure what it is though. I thought maybe ear infection, but he's sleeping well. I'm going to call the doctor's office here in a bit and see if they think I should do anything.

Poor little guy. I know how cranky I am when I don't feel well. I can only imagine how hard it is for toddlers when they can't communicate their feelings. We took Gabe up to the farm last night to see Gma & Papa (and all of the farm equipment). Gabe had a great time looking at all the tractors (looking at them = Papa letting him put the key in, starting them up, turn on the lights, etc...) He cried when Papa left his sight to go shut the machine shed doors for the evening ("Tractors go night night, Gabey") Then we watched a GREAT movie, The Bucket List. Love Jack Nicholson. Gabe went to bed in their crib pretty easily and woke up well. But as soon as we came home to go to bed, he was out like a light.

Tonight, Gabe's Dad is going to stay with him for a bit while I go with Missy, Katie, & Julia to paint pottery. I'm making Gabers a bowl for his crayons. I'll post pics!

Forgive me readers...

2008-06-25T18:52:00.007-05:00

For I have been a bad blogger. It has been 10 days since my last blog post.

I apologize in advance for this post. It may be kind of a downer. But, UGH. That's all I can say. Things have been hard lately. Like, really hard. Gabe has been quite a challenge. Temper tantrums have started and unfortunately they have started earlier than the "terrible two's". Is there such a thing as the Terrible 17th month?

I have been so frustrated because he just doesn't listen to us. I talked with my mom and she said "you just can't reason with a 1 1/2 year old". It makes me feel a little bit better. Because, to tell you the truth, I've been doubting myself a lot. Do I really have what it takes to be a good momma? Am I cut out for this? Am I going to "mess him up" if I don't do the right things? I know I'm going to make mistakes, but lately, it doesn't feel like I've been succeeding at anything. I feel like there's more pressure because he's adopted. What I mean by that is someone else - a complete stranger at the time - trusted me to raise her son. His birth family has never made me feel this way, but sometimes I feel like all eyes are on me. Like everyone is watching to see if I'll succeed or not in raising an adopted child.

I just love him so much. I want him to have a good childhood. I want him to be happy. I want so much for this wonderful child that has been entrusted to our care. But, at the same time, I don't want to give him all he wants all the time and raise a spoiled kid. I know it's a balance. I know you have to find what works. And, I know that each child is different. When do you figure it out? Is that like the secret to life question? The holy grail?

I guess we just have to do the best we can, try not to lose our mind analyzing all that we do, and just try to love the heck out of our kids... even when they have a tantrum. Even when they've woken up a couple of times during the night for an hour at a time. Even when they pull your hair. Even when they headbutt you and give you a fat lip (happened to me Sunday).

I would just ask that you pray for me, Gabe's Momma. That I cut myself a little bit of a break and that I realize that I'm doing the best I can do. I also ask that you pray for Greg too. We both are having a tough time with the tough love part of parenting. Lastly, please pray for wisdom for us - that we make the best choices for this awesome little guy. Thank you in advance for your prayers and again, sorry for the "Debbie Downer" post.

***Afterthought***

I did debate on putting this post on Gabe's Mom. I have tried really hard to keep from sharing the "ugly stuff" on here so Gabe doesn't have to read about it later. But, tonight, I realized that maybe it's not such a bad thing that he sees some of the challenges too. Hopefully, he will see that despite the tough times and the "terrible 17th month" that we still love him more than anything/anyone we could imagine. Maybe he'll see that being a parent isn't easy, but it is the best thing I've ever had the privilege of doing.

Here are a few photos of Gabe playing with the garden hose. This has become his new favorite activity.

Spraying Dad

Yes, Greg taught Gabe how to hold the hose like a "weiner". Ugh. Boys.

1st Father's Day

2008-06-15T09:54:00.015-05:00

Gabe's Dad,

Today is your 1st "Happy" Father's Day. Today you don't have to worry about an upcoming court date. Today, you can rest assured that Gabe is ours - that he is your son. What a wonderful feeling, huh? Here are a few pics of you with your boy:

Thank you, Gabe's Dad for always being such a great father to our boy. He loves you so much - and so do I.

Love,

Gabe's Mom

Forever

2008-06-14T19:47:00.004-05:00

We had our new concrete patio poured today and I just love it. My favorite part? Obviously, the above picture. It just gives me a sneak peak ahead into family barbeques, camp outs in Gabe's new playground - time as a family outside. The three of us. It feels so good to be able to say that.

The guys pouring the concrete were just great with Gabe. They didn't care if he was outside while they were preparing the land. They called up to him while he was watching from the bathroom window when they were pouring the concrete. This kid was loving it.

After we did the prints, I took Gabe over to the "dac-tur" and snapped this photo. I wish there was something I could do about the sunlight on his face... does anyone have any suggestions? Or, do I just leave it alone?

What a nice day I had with my boy today. Even though it was HOT (we didn't have central air today because they had to move the central air unit to put in the patio) we had a great time. We ran some errands, took some pictures, played, and now he's crashing and I'm going to go watch a movie.

The Other Nice Thing about Part Time Is...

2008-06-12T20:26:00.007-05:00

Two posts in one day! I took some pics at Grandma & PawPaw's today and thought I'd post a few:

A Year Ago

2008-06-12T11:17:00.003-05:00

At this time last year, a lot of things were going on in Gabe's life. We were trying cereal. We were anxiously awaiting the finalization of the adoption. We were LOVING riverdancing in the jumperoo. We were forcibly wearing tuxedo t-shirt onesies to make Gabe's Mom and Aunt Ne laugh.

A lot has happened since then. Our adoption was finalized. Gabe started speaking. Gabe started walking. Gabe has a sense of humor. Gabe has learned so very much.

As a parent, it's so easy to forget some of these milestones. It's so fun to remember them - that's why Gabe's Mom (the blog) exists. I wanted to capture day to day moments that I may not have time to write down, but that I could one day share with him. There's a site out there called blurb... does anyone know much about it? Amanda suggested it to me and I just wondered if anyone else had feedback on it too. Any other sites out there that anyone is aware of that can turn your blog into a book? Thought I do some comparison.

PS: Can I just say how much I LOVE being part time? I can actually blog in the middle of the day!

Gabe's Friends

2008-06-09T22:49:00.006-05:00

Our friends Craig and Darci were so generous and invited all of us to their family's cottage on the lake this last weekend. There were 4 babies there! All between the ages of 9 months to 16 months. Gabe had a great time with his friends. All of the kids were so good. Considering 3 of them were in a new place, they were fantastic. Gabe went on boat rides, played with new toys, and got to hang out with his buddy Jack:

A few times, Jack would say, "Hey, how about I take Gabe for a walk?" This gave me and Gabe's dad a chance to just sit down and relax and not have to worry about chasing after a toddler. I'm just so proud of how well Gabe behaved. I think we only had one little temper tantrum and it wasn't even a bad one. He did great on the car ride too.

I'm so happy that Gabe is going to grow up with this great support system of friends that we have in our lives. We've kept our small group going now for a few years and it is truly a joy to spend time together. We even get to see Jeremy & Opal, our former youth pastor and his wife, when we go to the cottage. It's awesome how we can just pick up from where we left off in talking with them.

I love all of these friends not just because of the fun we have with them, or the Bible studies we share, or the fellowship time we have, or the meals we share together. I love all of these friends because of how they love my son so much. It's so great to see someone love your child. It's a wonderful feeling. Afterall, Gabe is the bomb. He's an awesome kid and it's cool when other people see it too.

1st Haircut

2008-05-28T21:00:00.005-05:00

Look at this little stinker. Last Friday, Daddy and I took him for his first ever haircut. It's kind of weird to think that this is the hair he's had since he's been born. There wasn't too much to cut off, but Fergie did a great job. He cut my little brother's hair for the first time too. There's been a lot of first haircuts in that chair.

All in all, Gabe did pretty well. He had to sit on Daddy's lap and we had to break out the fruit snacks and ba ba to keep him still, but it worked.

Then, when we got outside, Gabe's Mom wanted some pics by the nostalgic barber pole (no, not Gabe's Mom!) The little stinker returned...

Somebody's been a good boy!

2008-05-26T21:01:00.010-05:00

Gabe got a new playset this weekend from Mommy & Daddy and the grandparents. We were so happy that we were able to find such an awesome one at Sam's Club. For the right price, this one had all the bells and whistles. We wanted to get something he would grow in to. We didn't want to waste a couple of hundred dollars on something he may only play with for a year. This one is awesome because it has a playhouse built in. And, his Daddy, his Papa & PawPaw, his Uncle Dan, and his Uncle Grant helped build it for him! The guys worked so hard today and really got most of it done. Here are a few more pics:

Holy crap... what have I gotten myself into?

Early in the day

Hey guys, I got the next piece!

Gabe & PaPa

Um, guys, did you forget about me?

So, it's been a pretty good weekend for this big boy! All the guys did a fantastic job and Gabe is just thrilled with it so far! He loves the slide and he can already climb the ladder. Why, oh why, did we buy our little daredevil such a big boy swingset? We're going to need to stay on our toes...

Daddy's Boy

2008-05-22T22:38:00.004-05:00

Yep, I'm pretty much chopped liver right now. But, hey when you see those two guys together -it's ok. Daddy, welcome home.

Yesterday

2008-05-18T11:07:00.007-05:00

This Blog Entry brought to you by Gabe:

So, yesterday, something really exciting happened. Daddy & Uncle Dan tore out the concrete in our backyard to make room for our new patio. I REALLY wanted to be out there with the Dingo to help them work, but Mommy thought it'd be too dangerous. SO, Mommy and I stood in the bathroom and watched the guys work:

I was really getting frustrated because Mommy wouldn't let me go out there. I couldn't see all that I wanted to see out the window. So, once I finally fussed enough, Mommy took me outside. Guess what I tried to eat?! DIRT! It was yummy and I wanted more, but Mommy said "no". I don't know why I couldn't have it! Daddy also showed me what an earthworm was! I got to hold it and I wasn't afraid at all! Mommy screamed, but I thought it was fun! Here's a picture of me and my pile of dirt:

And, finally, a picture of me picking the head off of a dandielion for my mommy - to make up for the worm:

It's a Boy

2008-05-13T21:53:00.002-05:00

Have I mentioned that I am now raising a BOY??? No longer a baby boy. Nope, no way. This little guy is all boy, all the time. He's constantly into dirt, tools, trucks, tractors, loaders, etc... He's not afraid of any of it. I do love this picture of him - a little boy, worn out from a tough day.

Gabe's Papa Doug likes to take him for 4-wheeler rides, truck rides, and bobcat rides. Gabe thinks he can steer and push buttons and pull levers. Papa loves it. I remember my little brother doing stuff like this too. It's awesome to have a little boy. It's also terrifying. Gabe has no fear and that's a very scary thing! He so loves to be outside. Daddy takes him out while they wait for me to get home from work and getting him in the house is like pulling teeth. One of his favorite things to do right now is play in the back of Daddy's truck (he has a topper). I never wanted a truck with a topper, but I'm actually thankful for it. Gabe LOVES the truck. He just runs around in there and begs Daddy to open the windows.

Here are some other new things:

Gabe's vocabulary: Dada, Mama, Papa, Tractor (dac-tur), Ball, Baba, Grandma (Abba), Uh 0h (he says Duh oh!) Dan (he says Da) that (Dat)
Sign vocabulary: More, Please, Thank you, Milk, Sorry
Skills: Throwing a ball (he's great at this!), Waving Bye Bye, Climbing stairs and going back down, running, Standing on toys, Making baskets, putting blocks together, eating with a fork
Comprehension: If you "cry" he gives you a hug or kiss, When he does something right, he claps his hands together one time (this is his sign for "good"), He understands when he goes night night that we say prayers and wave bye bye, He waves bye bye when he and Daddy are leaving for the sitter's house, He will sometimes pick up toys with you.
Challenges: Coming inside after playing outside with Daddy, Temper tantrums when he doesn't get his way (doesn't happen too often), some hitting issues still, throwing food when he's done eating, climbing to reach desired objects.

He's sure getting big, isn't he? I am just amazed each day at the new things this awesome kid does. I love him so much. I will be going to part time June 2 (!!!!), so I really look forward to having Thursdays and Fridays off to spend with him. I can't wait to take him up to the farm or to the park to play, or to go to the Pumpkin Patch this fall. It's going to be so great.

So, Did Ya Hear?

2008-05-07T22:09:00.003-05:00

Somebody totally rocked the house with these awesome shirts for Gabe! Thanks Grandma! LYWUTTS!!

Also, we have a new trick... Last night, Gabe used a fork to eat dinner! It was too cute. He was so proud of himself and he kept on diggin' in. My baby is growing up. He jumped on a trampoline the other night (supervised, of course).

Sometimes, especially when I'm going through Gabe's clothes and putting away the baby blue outfits he's outgrown, I get really sad. I do look forward to each new adventure like talking, riding bikes, etc... But, part of me mourns that cuddly baby stage. Even though I encourage his independence and try and teach him new things, part of me wants him to remain dependent on me. I miss him falling asleep in my arms with his ba ba. (Now I put him in the crib). I miss carrying him around everywhere, even though he was heavy. (Now, he runs all over the house). I think it's natural for moms to feel this way. I was just watching a Tivo'd Dr. Phil and some crazy lady still hadn't let go and let her son grow up ... he was 39 years old and he was still dependent on her. Now, that's an extreme.

I hope for Gabe that he develops a strong sense of independence, even if it means breaking away from me. It may hurt and I may miss those moments, but the more he does on his own and the more he grows, the better adjusted he'll be. I realize that I have quite a few years yet, but there will come a time when he's on his own. When he has a job and a family. God-willing, I'm there to witness it all. I hope that he'll be independent enough to have and enjoy those things, and dependent enough to lean on me when he needs me even then.

I miss those baby moments. But, I am enjoying each and every moment watching him grow and mature into a little boy. He learns new things all the time. He's like a little sponge just taking it all in. It's amazing. I can't stress enough how thankful I am to be a parent to such a wonderful, smart, funny, happy child. God has truly fulfilled the desires of my heart, just as He promised.

We love these guys!

2008-05-06T21:57:00.006-05:00

Gabe's Mom had another photo shoot tonight! It was too fun. These guys were all over the place!

This one's a little saturated, but I ran out of time tonight... and out of creativity...

Oh, yeah... and Gabe loves 'em too... - Gabe & the Bug

The Macaroni

2008-05-06T06:33:00.005-05:00

And, we met McCarthy last night. He is just too precious for words...

LOVE this kid.

2008-05-04T20:23:00.004-05:00

Just when I think this kid can't get any cuter, he goes and pulls something like this:

I'm sorry, but I really think I have one of THE cutest kids ever born. He was just hamming it up for me. My mom had given me this vintage afghan and I really loved it but didn't know what to do with it at the time. Well, I found Danielle Thompson's blog (she is my FAVORITE scrapbooker) and saw a vintage quilt that she used for a back drop in a photo of her son. Hmmm... I have an old afghan... I should totally do that! So, I called my teacher, and asked for some helpful hints because I really wanted these photos to be awesome. You can see more of them here. The above one has to be my all-time favorite of the Gabinator. I'm pretty proud of this photo. I love it. (Wow... Am I developing self-confidence???) I really wouldn't change a thing about it. Love the back drop, love the old coloring chair, and love the little tongue sticking out.

Ok, I do have to tell you one really funny thing that happened tonight and I SO wish I had taken my camera with me. We took Gabe to the Chinese buffet for supper and he ate very well, so we let him share some ice cream with us. A few bites into it, he grabs his head with both of his hands, gets a funny look on his face, and starts chomping his teeth. He had a brain freeze!! Greg and I were CRACKING up. It was so funny. Don't you wish you could go back and remember your first brain freeze? It's just one of those things you don't really think about. Gabe had to have been wondering, "what the heck?!" It was hilarious.

I've got a busy week, but hang tight loyal readers! I'll try and get a couple of posts in.

xoxo,
Gabe's Mom

POST 100!!! - Raising Evil Knievel

2008-04-28T21:38:00.004-05:00

First of all, Yippee!! Happy Birthday to Gabe's Mom (the Blog)! This is post #100!!

Secondly, I am raising Evil Knievel! This little man is not afraid of anything. In this picture, the 2 red circles are the injuries sustained this last weekend. The one on the left is from running in front of me and knocking into our desk in the kitchen. The one on the right is from jumping on the bed and falling off. I was right there... both times. I am not an irresponsible parent, I am just never sure what the heck this little guy is going to do. I may think he is going to do one thing, and then he goes and does another. My friend Tami told me that her son Nick always had bumps, bruises, etc... on his head. I always worry that people think I'm either an abusive mom or a negligent mom. Truth is, I'm very responsible, I'm very cautious, and I'm very attentive. However, I'm raising Mr. Knievel (there's no evil to him!) and he is afraid of nothing. I've heard boys will be boys. To any of the Gabe's Mom readers, were any of your kids this way? Were you constantly worrying about what people think? I hope he outgrows this dare devil phase. My rough and tough little man.

Tonight we took Gabers to town to look at a computer that Daddy was interested in. While Daddy was looking at computers, I took Gabe down the telephone isle. He was cracking up when I pretended the phone rang and I answered a bunch of different ones. Dad could hear him a few isles down. We told him if he was a good boy, we'd take him to the "pet store" aka Petco and let him look at the lizards, bugs, & fishies. He was just entranced by the fishies. It was too cute. We had a lot of fun tonight, me & my boys. I love them both so much.

Also, last night, Gabe showed a more sensitive side. He was having trouble going to sleep, so I thought I'd try rocking him. He's never really been a baby that needs to be rocked. He's always been ok with it, but it hasn't really been something he required. But, last night, I thought I'd try rocking him and singing to him. My little dare devil, on the go all the time boy sat on my lap for over a half hour with his head on my shoulder while I sang to him. I sang All This Time, Masterpiece, (both by Sandi Patty), Valentine (Martina McBride), and the traditionals like Rock a Bye Baby and Hush Little Baby. Let me tell you, this was truly one of those moments. The ones I dreamed of while we were waiting to be parents. As much as I didn't want the time to end, I had to put him to bed. He stayed awake the entire time, but began rubbing his eyes and I knew it was time. I love him so much. Sometimes I feel like I can't contain the joy that fills my heart in being his Mommy.

Thank you, readers, for sharing in this journey with me. I love being Gabe's Mom and I love that you all want to share part of this journey with me. Keep on reading... I'm going for 200!!

The First of Many

2008-04-24T23:27:00.003-05:00

I have a feeling this will be the first of many times that my tub sees dirty little boy hands like these. Gabe had just come in from playing outside all day. Actually, he didn't "just come inside". It took dragging, bribing, and Daddy strength to get this little bugger to come in the house. He just loves - loves loves loves - being outside. He's already taking 4-wheeler rides with Papa, learning how to change gears on the machinery, and running around in the yard chasing the dog. He's just growing up so fast. I love this little guy so much. How he has the energy though, I have NO idea! I need some of that! I've been dragging this week... It's been a busy one. It's 11:30 and Gabe's Mom is headed to bed. I don't even care if the bed bugs bite.

Oh Where Oh Where has Gabe's Mom Gone??

2008-04-20T12:58:00.006-05:00

Many apologies to regular readers! We've had a very busy week. Greg was gone on business this past week and every night, me & the Gabers had something going on. I was getting up around 5:45 every morning and not going to bed until after 11:00 each night. (That's not much sleep for me!) Gabe really missed his Daddy. Greg got home Friday night around 9:00 and woke Gabe up to see him for a bit. Gabe was so excited to see him. Now, if Greg leaves Gabe's sight, Gabe kinda has a fit.

This morning, Gabe started saying "Tractor"! It was so cute. His vocabulary now includes: Mama, Dada, Papa, Tractor, Diaper (Bi-per), & ball. Sometimes he'll say Bye Bye, but not very often. His sign language now includes: More, please, thank you, good (he just claps his hands together one time) & milk. It's hard to believe he's 15 months old already.

Monday night, Gabe's birth family is coming over to visit. I'm very excited to see them. I always like to see their reactions when they see Gabe for the first time in 3 months. It seems like he changes so much between the times that they see him. I always struggle with what to fix when they come over for dinner. Even though I don't have to, I still want to impress them. I probably shouldn't worry about it, but I do! Even though they don't have to, I want them to really like me. I am pretty sure they already do, but I guess I just need the reassurance. I know they're happy with the decision they made and I know we couldn't be happier with Gabe in our family. I'm just so thankful to her. So very, very thankful. She gave me the gift of being a mommy to a wonderful, happy, intelligent little boy. I hope each time we see them, she can tell how happy she has made me. I also hope that she can see that Gabe is happy.

Well, I promise to do a better job blogging this week. I apologize for my absence!

Kisses from Jinxi

Kissing Papa's Picture

Why we do what we do

2008-04-10T16:28:00.006-05:00

Monday, my little boy will be 15 months old. It feels like it was just yesterday when we brought him home and he made us a family. This year and three months has gone by so quickly. Isn't he precious? Gabey, Daddy and I love you more than words can say, more than songs can describe, and more than blogs can share. We love you up to the sky. We love you from here to the moon. Never forget for a minute, we will always do what we do because we love you - we will always be looking out for your best interest. Even if you get mad because we won't let you put your finger in the outlet or throw your toys in the toilet... We don't let you because we love you. Even if you cry when we bring you in the house after playing outside... We bring you in because it's cold and we don't want you to get sick. We do these things because we love you. Dear boy, YOU are a child of God and it is our job to keep you safe and to raise you under his loving care. We will make mistakes. You will get mad at us. But always know we do what we do because we love you and we're doing the best we can do.

Love,
Momma

Big Boy Stuff

2008-04-09T22:43:00.005-05:00

Yep, he still loves his big boy pillow from Tami. Even though he isn't sleeping on it, he's hugging it. Tami, this little guy sure loves it.

Gabe's been doing a lot of new things... let me just list a few:

He can now sign more, thank you, please, milk, and he can kind of sign good and bad (he just claps his hands together really hard). We've been trying to say "good boy" or "bad boy" just to help him understand when he does something he's supposed to ... or not supposed to ...

He has been saying "DaDa" rather consistently. Daddy is no longer "Bob". He also says Papa, Bubbles, and sometimes he'll say bye.

He has started throwing things. Everything he can get his hands on. This kid loves balls - basketballs, tennis balls, golf balls... He played with a "big boy" basketball at our neighbor's house and we could hardly tear him away from it.

Speaking of throwing... he's throwing temper tantrums. I mean laying on the floor, scooting with his feet, and crying when he doesn't get his way. Tonight, he bit Daddy. We had to put him in time out. I felt pretty awful about it. We had to use the high chair so he'd stay put and the entire time, he had his arms out and he was crying. We stayed in the room with him, but tried not to pay much attention to it. When we took him out of the chair, after about 1 minute, (he was still crying and pretty ticked) he settled down and was fine after that. Does anyone have any suggestions for the tantrums? Did we handle this right? Ugh.

He poops in the tub. Not a good milestone. Sorry to tell people this Gabe, but it's new and it's gross. I guess this embarassment is Mommy & Daddy's payback for having to clean it up! Love you!

He's kind of a ladies' man. This week at daycare, he kissed his old, steady flame AND he kissed an older girl! Please, Lord, tell me this isn't a preview of the years to come!

Now that the weather has been a lot nicer, Gabe's been playing outside a lot. He loves it and we are having a ball outside with him. It is so much fun to play with your kids outside.

Ok, one more pic for you... Twist my arm...

This picture says: "Yeah, I'm a big boy... I climbed the steps all by myself. Mommy was fake sneezing to get me to smile. It worked. I love that Momma."

Momma says: "And I love that Gabey."

Gabe, The Waterboy

2008-04-09T06:30:00.005-05:00

Not sure where he learned this... Greg and I don't do it. As much as we try to tell him not to do this with a straight face, we can't keep from laughing every time he does it! So, if you come over to our house and you're thirsty, just remember...

This is what happens at Gabe's house.

15 Month Pictures

2008-04-05T09:16:00.008-05:00

He's growing up. We had so much fun taking pictures yesterday. I love Portrait Innovations! Here's a few more:

Gabe & His Momma

Daddy's Outfit

2008-04-04T10:42:00.003-05:00

When Gabe was born, Greg's mom gave me some of Greg's baby things. Today, while we were getting clothes together for pictures this afternoon, I remembered that we had this one! It's a little small, so I don't think we'll take it for his pictures at the studio today, but I was able to get this one good shot. I tried an action on it that is for a vintage picture since Gabe's parents' childhood items are now vintage (ugh.). I do want to try some other actions with it to see what I can come up with. My computer is nearly dead, so I'm not able to do as much photo work as I'd like.

I can't believe he actually left this hat on! Happy Friday to you all and have a GREAT weekend!

Happy Thursday! Just Because We Love You!!

2008-04-03T08:05:00.003-05:00

If this doesn't make you smile, well.... you got problems. S'all I'm sayin'.

It's An Original.

2008-03-31T20:34:00.003-05:00

Ok, definitely one of my favorite pics of Gabe. One of my best friends, Tami Lyons made this adorable Cars-Cars blanket and pillow for Gabe. He LOVES it.

We have a funny story about this awesome blanket. When we were on the plane heading to Arizona, Greg was sitting next to a guy that noticed Gabe's blanket and an interesting conversation took place:

Guy: "Wow, that blanket is so cute. My son loves Cars. Where did you find it?"

Greg (eagerly giving a sarcastic response): "Oh, well, they're really hard to find. It's a local artist in Illinois. She's really pricey. She does a great job, but she's in high demand."

Guy: "Oh." (sulking a wee bit...) "Well, what's the name? Could I maybe get one?"

Greg (loving every minute of this): "Well, it's a Tamilyon's original. There's only one like it."

Guy: "Oh".

It was just so funny. Greg couldn't resist calling Tami to tell her that he had totally talked her up to this guy. Tami, it is an original... you da' bomb-diggity. Gabe loves it and we all love you!

The Middle - Part 2

2008-03-30T21:59:00.006-05:00

So, where did I leave off?

If you're a follower of our blog, then you'll remember that I was telling our story. The story of how we became a family. I have gotten a lot of comments from others on sharing our story. Many people have been glad that we've shared it. So, now, it is time for the 2nd installment.

When Greg told me that he wanted to pursue adoption, I was thrilled. I couldn't believe my ears. My best friend and I had literally been praying for God to move him and open him up to the possibility of loving a child that was not biologically ours. Oh, does God work in such magnificent ways. He knew the timing. He knew what would happen.

So, in the early Fall of 2005, we began asking around about adoption agencies. We had an acquaintance that was "in" the adoption field and we asked him where he would go if he could choose an agency. He suggested The Love Basket. He said they were wonderful people to work with. So, I contacted them and we requested an initial application. We completed the initial paperwork and waited. On Thanksgiving, we found out that our first application (Packet I) had been approved. With that letter, we received Packet II. This packet contained an application that was a lot longer. This required references with letters, physical exams, salary and tax information, our marriage history, etc. This packet was at least an inch and 1/2 thick when we received it.

So, we worked and worked on this packet. We had to tell our life stories, how we met, how we handled conflict, etc... This took quite a while. Also, because Love Basket is based in Missouri, we had to find an Illinois-based agency to conduct our home study. I was a little nervous about the idea of a home study. I was so afraid (which I know now I totally shouldn't have been!) that they'd find something wrong with our house. Should I light candles for a nice smelling house or will she think that's a fire hazard? Should I bake cookies, or is that too June Cleaver? Should I leave vacuum marks in the carpet, or does that look like I'm a clean freak? All of these things pop into your head. You just want to make the best impression.

So, after calling a lot of agencies in Illinois, I found one that we really liked. Our case worker, A., met with us briefly to just do a meet & greet before we set up the home study. We really liked A. She was around our age and didn't make us feel nervous at all. We set up the home study for the end of March, 2006. All the while, we were working diligently on Packet II.

For Packet II and for the home study, we had to be fingerprinted. We also needed copies of our taxes, birth certificates, and marriage licenses. For Packet II, because Love Basket is a Christian-based organization, we had to have a reference from our pastor and we had to attend a panel discussion hosted at Love Basket. We also attended an adoption support group located in a nearby city. Both of these experiences have been invaluable to us as adoptive parents. We learned so much about open adoption and how to treat birth parents. We also learned a lot about the stereotypes of adoption. We were so impacted by the panel discussion and the support group. We just knew that God had pointed us in the right direction. In fact, the panel discussion (held in January of 2006) solidified our decision. We knew we were meant to adopt. In addition to the panel discussion, support group, fingerprinting, and life histories, we had to attend CPR training as well as parenting classes. We sat in the parenting classes with a bunch of pregnant couples. We were the only waiting adoptive parents in the group and everyone wanted to talk to us. They were so interested in our story, the process, and how long things took. We were the first adoptive couple that our teacher had instructed too. That parenting class was fun and invaluable. Every couple should take one of those classes when preparing for a baby.

Our home study went very well in March and we found out shortly after that we had passed. In preparing for the home study, we had to complete a TON of paperwork for our Illinois agency as well! I think had we known that we'd like A and the agency so well, we probably would've just skipped working with Love Basket, but Love Basket was essential in our adoption journey. We learned so much from their requirements. We never would've attended the panel or the support group. We also never would've met some wonderful people. Next, we had to wait for the Illinois agency to get the home study report to Love Basket. A advised us that she would also show our profile as well if we would like so we could have it shown in multiple states. I was all for that! The more agencies that had our profile (a small scrapbook about us that birth parents viewed) the better.

So, now, it's June of 2006, all the paperwork is done... and we wait...

Vacation Recap

2008-03-29T14:43:00.013-05:00

So, we're home from Arizona! Travelling with a toddler - what an adventure. What an unbelievably exhausting trip - notice... I didn't say vacation! Don't get me wrong, it had it's fun moments, but it wasn't exactly relaxing! I am glad to be home, and I'm glad to have my baby boy back. Here's a recap of the trip, just to give you an idea of how things went:

Friday: We leave for the airport and things are going great. We got some cute pics of Gabers at the airport and he did fantastic on the flights. He slept most of the second flight, which was the longer of the two at 4 hours. We arrived in Scottsdale at our condo at around 11:00 pm - their time (1:00 am our time) and Gabers was wide awake. He went to bed after about 45 minutes and all was well.

Saturday: We did some swimming and noticed Gabe just wasn't acting like himself. We thought maybe the clorine bothered him or most likely he was just overtired from the travelling the day before, but we couldn't really figure it out. We took it kind of easy and had an early night. We had PF Chang's w/Papa and Grandma too!

Sunday: Let me introduce "Damian"! WOW. I've never seen this kid act like this before (or any other kid for that matter!) We had pancakes by the pool and Gabe wouldn't eat, which is way unlike him... normally, he's wolfing those things down! It's one of his favorite foods. After pancakes, the resort sponsored an Easter egg hunt for the kids. Gabe wasn't too thrilled about that either. So, we went back to the condo and that's when Damian came out to play! He was just inconsolable. He rolled around on the floor and just screamed. By this point, Greg, Gabe's Mom, and Grandma were all getting scared, so we decided to take him to the ER. Scottsdale has a Mayo Hospital so we went there.

First of all, we were there for nearly 6 hours with an inconsolable baby. Secondly, the doctor was pretty much a jerk. Third, we found out that Gabe did not have influenza (after a torturing nose swab!). Finally, we found out that he most likely had strep. (I also had it) The doctor saw white spots on the back of his throat, but the test results would take 2 days to confirm. He prescribed the tasty "pink stuff" antibiotic and tylenol with codeine to help with the pain and to help Gabe sleep. Before going to the ER we were having the worst time getting Gabe to eat, drink, poop, or sleep.

Monday: We followed the doctor's orders regarding the meds. Gabe was still miserable. The tylenol w/codeine was knocking him out. He was absolutely exhausted. We took him to dinner with the rest of the family that evening for Grandma & Papa's anniversary and he just did not behave. Damian returns!!

Tuesday: We called our doctor back home and found out the ER doctor had prescribed WAY too much tylenol with codeine. Our doctor said the only time they ever give a 14 month old tylenol with codeine is after a surgery. They said at most they would give him 1/2 a teaspoon before bed. The ER doc had prescribed 1 teaspoon every 4 hours. Gabe was still so cranky because he was drugged out and everyone was trying to cheer him up!! He just wanted to be left alone so he could pass out and sleep. Tuesday we also took a drive with him through the desert. He slept the entire time. We stopped the codeine medicine that morning and gave him only tylenol if he seemed to be in pain. We haven't decided if we're going to report that doctor or anything. The thing that makes me so angry is that codeine slows your respirations. Gabe could've seriously been injured! Or, he could've stopped breathing!

Wednesday: We're starting to get our baby back. We took him to the Grand Canyon and it was just breathtaking! He was tired of being in the stroller and wanted out! I was not about to let him out though... way too dangerous!! The trip to the Grand Canyon took a total of 8 hours in the car. Due to the tylenol still in his system, Gabe slept for 6 of those hours.

Thursday: We finally had our child back! We took Gabe to the Phoenix Zoo and it was great. He was a little warm, but he enjoyed seeing the animals. We only spent about an hour there because of the heat, but we finally had our baby boy back. It was great to see him enjoying things again. That afternoon, we went to the pool with all of the cousins for some fun. That evening Gabe's Aunts, Uncles, & cousins watched him so Gabe's Dad and I could go out for supper. We had a great meal and we both had Gelato on the way home! It was yummy!!

Friday: We left Scottsdale at 7:30 am and got back to Illinois at 10:00 pm. Gabe did great on the first flight (3 1/2 hours - he slept the entire time) and was pretty much a stinker on the final hour and 1/2 flight. We were glad to be back safe and sound. We all crashed in our own beds. Ahhh....

So, overall, it was a pretty rough vacation for our first travelling experience with a toddler. But, thank God he's ok and we made it home safe and sound. We had a great time with our family. They are the best - they all just love Gabe so much and it's so great as a parent to see your family love your child. You just know they're going to grow up with a great support system. Gabe loves his cousins and has become his cousin Braden's shadow. His cousin Katie helped with babysitting for the first time on this trip too. That's kind of crazy for me since I used to babysit her! We're so fortunate to have been able to go on this trip with our family. I love that Gabe will grow up going on vacations like Greg and I did as kids. We're making memories.